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Entry tags:
fic post:Live No Life
Title: Live No Life
Author:Roxymissrose
Pairing:Lex/Clark
WIP:: 5/5
Rating:R
Spoilers: none
Word Count:3198
Summary: Lex and Clark have such influence on each other, whether they know it or not.
Notes: This is the answer to the "A Clexian Tale" challenge. I finally answered it, almost six months later....
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
I
Lex stepped around a large puddle of thick slush, nearly stepped into it as a stiff gust of wind blew, pushing him sideways. His scarf flung itself even tighter around his neck, and he cursed quietly to himself. No one noticed him, no one stopped to look. He was just another business man rushing home, another one of the faceless, in off-the-rack wool coats, serviceable shoes...he sighed. He did miss custom made boots…very much so. He grimaced as icy sludge oozed through unsealed stitching.
The faster moving crowd parted around him constantly, intent on Christmas shopping, intent on getting home, on celebrating Superman’s return to Metropolis, to life. Lex was just as fiercely intent on ignoring them—the season—the man.
It was a year past and another Christmas upon them, since the ‘death’ of Superman. It had taken nearly a month from the time he’d abandoned Lex to reappear in the skies, and Lex wondered where he had been…Martha had never told him where Clark was. And Clark Kent never did make a return. His memory still floated at the bottom of the Atlantic and the last time Lex and Martha spoke, she told him she was finally selling the farm, moving to Metropolis. She sounded happy, excited, and he’d promised to be her escort any time she needed. With the sale of the farm, the last important tie to Smallville would be gone, another part of his past dead and gone, like Jonathan Kent, who he’d so wanted to be like, who he’d wanted so much, to like him—or at least accept him.
Like Clark Kent, gone forever.
Cal Ellison, on the other hand, was alive and doing quite well—Galaxy Broadcasting’s dashing anchorman. Lex laughed. It was strange how the world worked. Lex was nothing now like the man who’d bargained for Superman’s body what seemed like a lifetime ago, nothing like the boy who’d almost died in Smallville. And nothing like the man Lionel Luthor had groomed to assume his mantle. Lex smirked, felt satisfied that’s he’d leveled that tree, ripped out every root and sucker.
As for the new Superman… well. He had no idea what kind of man he was. He’d only known Clark Kent.
He pulled up the collar of his coat, headed for a car parked in a public garage, a late model Mercedes--the lone survivor of the fleet of cars he’d once had at his disposal. The wind swirled down the ramp after him, blowing dry flakes of snow, and bits and scraps of garbage. It swirled around his ankles, tugged at his coat until it wrapped around his legs like a hungry cat, and suddenly blew straight up his back.
“How does it feel to be poor?”
Lex stopped. He smiled, laughed softly, and walked on without a backward look.
The voice at his back continued. “When I woke up, I remembered everything…what you did—what I did, and I wanted to hate you. No one should see another person reduced to so vulnerable a position, so helpless…I thought…I thought you might use it. Mostly I was afraid. My old life and my new life were jumbled in my head and I didn’t know what was real so I chose the old, the familiar.”
Lex nodded. Logical. He would have done the same.
“My memories are like stop motion film—huge frames are missing from the movie of my life.” Lex heard a small chuckle, smiled in automatic response. The voice behind him seemed closer now, and went on. “Mostly I remember…I remember now, loving you. A lot.”
Lex felt warmth at his back, his car chirped as he pressed the key.
“Well, I can understand that you don’t want to talk to or look at me. I’d hate me too. I have hated me…”
Lex opened his car door, slid in and locked it. He sat still for a moment. Once, Lex Luthor would have thrown the olive branch to the ground. But time stops for no one, not even for a Luthor. “My windows are open at night,” he said into the interior of the car, and drove away.
Midnight, and he heard movement outside his bedroom door and made room in the bed. A tall shape stood in the doorway, hesitated until Lex lifted his hand. There was a sound, the snap of fabric whipped in a wind, a breeze and then…velvet warmth against him.
“What do I call you?” Lex arched into the warm arms wrapped around him, smooth skin slid against his own, lips pressed to his throat.
“Call me Kal...” Kal looked into his eyes. “…the name I was born with.”
Lex felt curiosity lurch alive in his chest. It was a struggle for a moment, the habits of a lifetime were difficult to erase entirely. He willed himself to relax, and he let it go, and only then did he feel how tense Clark—Kal was. The arms around his chest loosened, their hold became a caress again. Lex laughed to himself. If Kal had killed him…it would have been just the kind of perversely humorous justice the universe seemed to enjoy doling out to him. He reached up and pulled Kal down to him, asked, “Do you miss your life, Kal?”
“Sometimes. But…I gained as much as I lost. Do you miss yours?” He moved against Lex, and Lex groaned at the feel of his dick sliding against Kal’s, hot and so alive. Kal grinned, and flexed.
Lex tried to answer him. “No, not—not much, not often…” he moaned and gasped as Kal kept moving. “It’s—oh god--it’s been a while,” he said, with what would have been an apologetic shrug, if he hadn’t been pinned to the mattress.
Kal raised an eyebrow and a slow, hot smile curved his lips. “Saving yourself for me.” Not a question, a statement, punctuated with his hand wrapped around Lex’s dick. “I learned from you, took your example and simplified my life--I don’t waste as much time worrying about what I can’t fix, I just do what I can to fix what’s possible.”
Hearing words that could have been his coming from Kal’s mouth sent a cold chill down his spine. He’d had no idea he’d been such an effective teacher—but considering what his life was now, Clark had been an effective teacher also—he held tighter to Kal. It was a balance.
“I help them, because they can’t help themselves…but I don’t blame myself for their failures…” Kal went on, licked a broad stripe down Lex’s neck, mouthed along his collarbone. He whispered against Lex’s damp skin. “Thank you for that…”
He sucked a path across Lex’s chest, stopping to play with his nipples, teasing until Lex cried out in frustration, and pre-come made their slide together easier. Kal chuckled softly and pushed fingers into Lex’s mouth, sliding them slowly back and forth, gently…they were dripping wet as he pulled them slowly out of Lex’s mouth, and he turned Lex to his belly. Lex groaned. “I don’t…Kal, don’t, you’ll kill me.”
Kal laughed. “I promise, I’ll bring you back to life,” and as he played, Kal told him how much he loved him and something special would happen now that they were one and Lex let the feeling take him, let the belief fill him, and knew he was being distracted from something important. It didn’t matter the minute Kal eased his fingers into him, rubbing the tight ring, coaxing it open, letting it get used to the invasion, slid down his body and with gentle movement in and out Kal opened him, with fingers and kisses and wet, wet tongue, made him receptive… He rode back up the length of Lex’s lean body, stopping to nip and taste along the way.
Fingers still lazily moving in him, Kal straddled him, kissed the base of Lex’s skull and bore down inside him. Lex gasped as lightening tingled along his nerves, surged through him, made him wish to come, “Fuck me, fuck me, Clark.”
“Kal.”
Firm, a reprimand—his hand splayed in the middle of Lex’s back, he held him down and without warning shoved inside—a shattering plunge into pain for Lex--so unexpected and overwhelming that breathing was impossible for what seemed like an eternity before his lungs finally responded to his demand for air, now, lots of it. “Shit—hurts,” Lex gasped, and sweat rolled down his face, into his eyes, his mouth. His breath blew against the sheets, the scent of linen filled his nose, he tasted it as he sucked fabric up against his open mouth in his struggle to breathe and it occurred to him that perhaps Clark—Kal—hadn’t forgiven a damn thing—perhaps he’d finally become a much, much better liar….
Kal turned Lex’s head and kissed his cheek. “You’re afraid, don’t be afraid. Breathe, Lex, breathe…” swept his hand over Lex’s dick, tightening and releasing again and again until Lex was moaning, hard, and all the while, fucked him with shallow strokes until Lex felt the need for him to fuck faster, deeper. Waves of pleasure radiated out from the ring of muscle straining to grip Kal's dick, he felt his whole body ride the crest of pleasure Kal gave him sliding in deep, relished the pull that tugged his whole body, made him throb when he slid out…he quivered and gasped and begged for more, and it never seemed enough—
Kal groaned, “Feel it, feel it…we make something…wonderful together,” he moaned and tensed, and came. Lex held back, reluctant to lose the barest second of Kal’s orgasm, until he couldn’t hold any longer, his eyes closed and Kal held him, harsh whisper filling his ear, “Now, now, come now,” and Lex spilled hard and hot ,and slid in the come that filled Kal’s hand….
Afterward, they lay in each other’s arms, tangled together and inseparable. “There’s no going back, you know that. I think we’re stuck with each other--” Lex smiled.
Kal shook his head. “We’re so much less when we’re apart, we’re missing something…but together--” he kissed Lex’s mouth, “--we’re whole.”
******
Kal slept heavily, taking up most of the surface of the bed, covers flung away from him and dipping to the floor in a rumpled mess. From his seat on the deep windowsill facing the bed, Lex watched Kal breathe. He leaned against the chilly window panes behind him, and sank deep in thought, wandered through a labyrinth of emotion, memories, regrets and hope for the future. Kal slipped in and out of shadow as sleepy movement brought him into and out of the faint light the moon shed…Lex marveled that in sleep, his face was again innocent as a boy’s. Still the hero of the people, still the protector of the innocent…just not the open wound he’d been before crashing against Lex.
Lex smiled down at him. Whether Cal Ellison realized it or not, he was nowhere near as damaged as he seemed to think he was. He thought about what Kal had said before sleeping, recalled a quote he’d always thought was rather fantastic—impossible to feel that way about another person, or so he’d always believed….“So dear I love him that with him all deaths I could endure, without him live no life,” Lex muttered, and Kal sighed and turned in his sleep.
Ridiculous, Lex thought, and rose from the seat. He pulled the rumpled sheet up and covered Kal, and with his thumb lightly traced his cheekbone.
Absolutely ridiculous.
12-06-2006
This piece by![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
osiness was the inspiration for the end bit. Thank you again, my dear
Author:Roxymissrose
Pairing:Lex/Clark
WIP:: 5/5
Rating:R
Spoilers: none
Word Count:3198
Summary: Lex and Clark have such influence on each other, whether they know it or not.
Notes: This is the answer to the "A Clexian Tale" challenge. I finally answered it, almost six months later....
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
I
Lex stepped around a large puddle of thick slush, nearly stepped into it as a stiff gust of wind blew, pushing him sideways. His scarf flung itself even tighter around his neck, and he cursed quietly to himself. No one noticed him, no one stopped to look. He was just another business man rushing home, another one of the faceless, in off-the-rack wool coats, serviceable shoes...he sighed. He did miss custom made boots…very much so. He grimaced as icy sludge oozed through unsealed stitching.
The faster moving crowd parted around him constantly, intent on Christmas shopping, intent on getting home, on celebrating Superman’s return to Metropolis, to life. Lex was just as fiercely intent on ignoring them—the season—the man.
It was a year past and another Christmas upon them, since the ‘death’ of Superman. It had taken nearly a month from the time he’d abandoned Lex to reappear in the skies, and Lex wondered where he had been…Martha had never told him where Clark was. And Clark Kent never did make a return. His memory still floated at the bottom of the Atlantic and the last time Lex and Martha spoke, she told him she was finally selling the farm, moving to Metropolis. She sounded happy, excited, and he’d promised to be her escort any time she needed. With the sale of the farm, the last important tie to Smallville would be gone, another part of his past dead and gone, like Jonathan Kent, who he’d so wanted to be like, who he’d wanted so much, to like him—or at least accept him.
Like Clark Kent, gone forever.
Cal Ellison, on the other hand, was alive and doing quite well—Galaxy Broadcasting’s dashing anchorman. Lex laughed. It was strange how the world worked. Lex was nothing now like the man who’d bargained for Superman’s body what seemed like a lifetime ago, nothing like the boy who’d almost died in Smallville. And nothing like the man Lionel Luthor had groomed to assume his mantle. Lex smirked, felt satisfied that’s he’d leveled that tree, ripped out every root and sucker.
As for the new Superman… well. He had no idea what kind of man he was. He’d only known Clark Kent.
He pulled up the collar of his coat, headed for a car parked in a public garage, a late model Mercedes--the lone survivor of the fleet of cars he’d once had at his disposal. The wind swirled down the ramp after him, blowing dry flakes of snow, and bits and scraps of garbage. It swirled around his ankles, tugged at his coat until it wrapped around his legs like a hungry cat, and suddenly blew straight up his back.
“How does it feel to be poor?”
Lex stopped. He smiled, laughed softly, and walked on without a backward look.
The voice at his back continued. “When I woke up, I remembered everything…what you did—what I did, and I wanted to hate you. No one should see another person reduced to so vulnerable a position, so helpless…I thought…I thought you might use it. Mostly I was afraid. My old life and my new life were jumbled in my head and I didn’t know what was real so I chose the old, the familiar.”
Lex nodded. Logical. He would have done the same.
“My memories are like stop motion film—huge frames are missing from the movie of my life.” Lex heard a small chuckle, smiled in automatic response. The voice behind him seemed closer now, and went on. “Mostly I remember…I remember now, loving you. A lot.”
Lex felt warmth at his back, his car chirped as he pressed the key.
“Well, I can understand that you don’t want to talk to or look at me. I’d hate me too. I have hated me…”
Lex opened his car door, slid in and locked it. He sat still for a moment. Once, Lex Luthor would have thrown the olive branch to the ground. But time stops for no one, not even for a Luthor. “My windows are open at night,” he said into the interior of the car, and drove away.
Midnight, and he heard movement outside his bedroom door and made room in the bed. A tall shape stood in the doorway, hesitated until Lex lifted his hand. There was a sound, the snap of fabric whipped in a wind, a breeze and then…velvet warmth against him.
“What do I call you?” Lex arched into the warm arms wrapped around him, smooth skin slid against his own, lips pressed to his throat.
“Call me Kal...” Kal looked into his eyes. “…the name I was born with.”
Lex felt curiosity lurch alive in his chest. It was a struggle for a moment, the habits of a lifetime were difficult to erase entirely. He willed himself to relax, and he let it go, and only then did he feel how tense Clark—Kal was. The arms around his chest loosened, their hold became a caress again. Lex laughed to himself. If Kal had killed him…it would have been just the kind of perversely humorous justice the universe seemed to enjoy doling out to him. He reached up and pulled Kal down to him, asked, “Do you miss your life, Kal?”
“Sometimes. But…I gained as much as I lost. Do you miss yours?” He moved against Lex, and Lex groaned at the feel of his dick sliding against Kal’s, hot and so alive. Kal grinned, and flexed.
Lex tried to answer him. “No, not—not much, not often…” he moaned and gasped as Kal kept moving. “It’s—oh god--it’s been a while,” he said, with what would have been an apologetic shrug, if he hadn’t been pinned to the mattress.
Kal raised an eyebrow and a slow, hot smile curved his lips. “Saving yourself for me.” Not a question, a statement, punctuated with his hand wrapped around Lex’s dick. “I learned from you, took your example and simplified my life--I don’t waste as much time worrying about what I can’t fix, I just do what I can to fix what’s possible.”
Hearing words that could have been his coming from Kal’s mouth sent a cold chill down his spine. He’d had no idea he’d been such an effective teacher—but considering what his life was now, Clark had been an effective teacher also—he held tighter to Kal. It was a balance.
“I help them, because they can’t help themselves…but I don’t blame myself for their failures…” Kal went on, licked a broad stripe down Lex’s neck, mouthed along his collarbone. He whispered against Lex’s damp skin. “Thank you for that…”
He sucked a path across Lex’s chest, stopping to play with his nipples, teasing until Lex cried out in frustration, and pre-come made their slide together easier. Kal chuckled softly and pushed fingers into Lex’s mouth, sliding them slowly back and forth, gently…they were dripping wet as he pulled them slowly out of Lex’s mouth, and he turned Lex to his belly. Lex groaned. “I don’t…Kal, don’t, you’ll kill me.”
Kal laughed. “I promise, I’ll bring you back to life,” and as he played, Kal told him how much he loved him and something special would happen now that they were one and Lex let the feeling take him, let the belief fill him, and knew he was being distracted from something important. It didn’t matter the minute Kal eased his fingers into him, rubbing the tight ring, coaxing it open, letting it get used to the invasion, slid down his body and with gentle movement in and out Kal opened him, with fingers and kisses and wet, wet tongue, made him receptive… He rode back up the length of Lex’s lean body, stopping to nip and taste along the way.
Fingers still lazily moving in him, Kal straddled him, kissed the base of Lex’s skull and bore down inside him. Lex gasped as lightening tingled along his nerves, surged through him, made him wish to come, “Fuck me, fuck me, Clark.”
“Kal.”
Firm, a reprimand—his hand splayed in the middle of Lex’s back, he held him down and without warning shoved inside—a shattering plunge into pain for Lex--so unexpected and overwhelming that breathing was impossible for what seemed like an eternity before his lungs finally responded to his demand for air, now, lots of it. “Shit—hurts,” Lex gasped, and sweat rolled down his face, into his eyes, his mouth. His breath blew against the sheets, the scent of linen filled his nose, he tasted it as he sucked fabric up against his open mouth in his struggle to breathe and it occurred to him that perhaps Clark—Kal—hadn’t forgiven a damn thing—perhaps he’d finally become a much, much better liar….
Kal turned Lex’s head and kissed his cheek. “You’re afraid, don’t be afraid. Breathe, Lex, breathe…” swept his hand over Lex’s dick, tightening and releasing again and again until Lex was moaning, hard, and all the while, fucked him with shallow strokes until Lex felt the need for him to fuck faster, deeper. Waves of pleasure radiated out from the ring of muscle straining to grip Kal's dick, he felt his whole body ride the crest of pleasure Kal gave him sliding in deep, relished the pull that tugged his whole body, made him throb when he slid out…he quivered and gasped and begged for more, and it never seemed enough—
Kal groaned, “Feel it, feel it…we make something…wonderful together,” he moaned and tensed, and came. Lex held back, reluctant to lose the barest second of Kal’s orgasm, until he couldn’t hold any longer, his eyes closed and Kal held him, harsh whisper filling his ear, “Now, now, come now,” and Lex spilled hard and hot ,and slid in the come that filled Kal’s hand….
Afterward, they lay in each other’s arms, tangled together and inseparable. “There’s no going back, you know that. I think we’re stuck with each other--” Lex smiled.
Kal shook his head. “We’re so much less when we’re apart, we’re missing something…but together--” he kissed Lex’s mouth, “--we’re whole.”
******
Kal slept heavily, taking up most of the surface of the bed, covers flung away from him and dipping to the floor in a rumpled mess. From his seat on the deep windowsill facing the bed, Lex watched Kal breathe. He leaned against the chilly window panes behind him, and sank deep in thought, wandered through a labyrinth of emotion, memories, regrets and hope for the future. Kal slipped in and out of shadow as sleepy movement brought him into and out of the faint light the moon shed…Lex marveled that in sleep, his face was again innocent as a boy’s. Still the hero of the people, still the protector of the innocent…just not the open wound he’d been before crashing against Lex.
Lex smiled down at him. Whether Cal Ellison realized it or not, he was nowhere near as damaged as he seemed to think he was. He thought about what Kal had said before sleeping, recalled a quote he’d always thought was rather fantastic—impossible to feel that way about another person, or so he’d always believed….“So dear I love him that with him all deaths I could endure, without him live no life,” Lex muttered, and Kal sighed and turned in his sleep.
Ridiculous, Lex thought, and rose from the seat. He pulled the rumpled sheet up and covered Kal, and with his thumb lightly traced his cheekbone.
Absolutely ridiculous.
12-06-2006
This piece by
osiness was the inspiration for the end bit. Thank you again, my dear
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I'm confused as to why Cal/Clark would say that. I thought it was Lex at first.
I loved the ending. I'm glad they found a way to be together again, after Lex's redemption. They are like two different people and maybe they can really make a new start. They realize that they love each other and that's what matters in the end.
Wonderful writing, Roxy! Superb! I hope you don't keep us waiting for another SV story for long!
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that's really, really good. odd that i don't miss clark kent at all. poor!lex i like a lot!
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*tighthug*
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*wow*
I'm also hoping you're feeling a bit better today, honey.
{{{warmgetwellsnuggles&kisses}}}
Re: *wow*
I'm so pleased you liked the story-it makes me so happy to see you in comments!
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I really enjoyed this. ^^ It was pretty neat seeing Clark-as-a-child and I really liked how Lex became more and more sympathetic to Martha after having to "raise" his very own super "kid". ^^
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Now I'm going to have to print it all out so that I can go and curl up in bed with it and enjoy it all over again :)
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and yay! I'm bedside reading material--woo-hoo!
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(Great writing of Martha, too!)
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Also, your icon is to die for!
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they are totally messed up, fucked up, fuck, err , stuck with each other, whats there with happy endings!??!?
totally happy *g*
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Strangely, those lines about Lex letting go of Clark Kent and Jonathan just seemed so impossibly sad. He was never able to get either of the male Kent's approval, much as he tried.
And eee! A little squee as our other hero reappears. "Windows open at night"? *brr* But yay, and even more yay.
Because Kal -- has dropped the agony of guilt for NOT saving everyone. Lex might fear that change in him but, how much better for Kal to feel that way? *loves*
and holy moly, that is one dangerously hot love scene, Roxy. (fans self)
Kal shook his head. “We’re so much less when we’re apart, we’re missing something…but together--” he kissed Lex’s mouth, “--we’re whole.”
That is the essence of it all, and why we love them!
*HUGS* so tight. :D
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I liked writing this, it kind of came out of no where and ruled my life for a few days. I constantly struggle to fix Lex's life, poor baby. *G*
I'm really glad you liked it! *HUGS*
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