Help!

[roxy]

Stuck. Blocked. Zippo.Nada,nothing,blank, zilch.

*Stares into void where story used to be*

Damn.OK, move along nothing to see here, unless the sight of a portly middle-aged woman screaming and rending her garments is your idea of a good time. Well, heh, it is kind of funny actually...the rending part was a little tough, cotton tears a lot easier on TV then in real life(take note, you guys who have your boys ripping each others clothes off.Eeep! makes note to use in fic...some fucking day)

Sooo, how was your day? Funny stories? I've got one...no, wait--I tell a lie....NOTHING'S funny today!
Schpiiiit-tooiie!

Oh well.
Portly...*snicker*

Comments

[justabi.livejournal.com]

So my dad is a bilateral below the knee amputee. (I know this doesn't sound like a funny story, but we all know my sense of humor is a little warped...) He got the first foot amputated about 3 years ago and when he got his prosthetic foot he had to name it. So he did. Frank. Frank Footer. And then about a year and a half ago when he got the other one done and his brand spanking new foot he named that one, too. Stein. So now he has Fank 'n Stein. So wait, I know, can it get more creepily funny? Yes, yes it can. He takes his foot off, holds it next to him and says, "I just don't know what to do, Abi. I'm beside myself."

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

*goggle* This is the thing were you guffaw, then go eep--then laugh again...erm--thanks!

[justabi.livejournal.com]

I know is more freakish than funny, but I'm trying to distract the evil muse's attention so she will let you write in peace.

You want to know my dad's favorite joke? What do you call a schoolbus full of white kids? A twinkie.

Is it any wonder I am the way I am...

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

AaaH! That is soo funny! Wrong of course,*koff,koff, must never tell it in public koff*

And I lub the way you am!

[justabi.livejournal.com]

Do you want to hear my only lesbian joke? (My friend went to a college with 80% women, guess how many were straight. That's right, like 2 of them...anyway, he is a very bad influence.)

What do you call a lesbian dinasaur?

Lickalottapus.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

AaaH! Chastise yourself severly! *will be telling that one to the niece--who insists on calling me Tanti Lesbo because of my innocent crush on Sharon Stone*

[justabi.livejournal.com]

Hey, since I've been shacking up with abisgirl for more than 7 years I get to tell dyke jokes. *looks ashamed and chastized*

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Seven years! Awww! All in love!I found around the seventh year, we really began to be a team--but I'm pretty stubborn so maybe it's just me!*G*

Well. I suppose it's ok about the jokes...maybe just funnier ones? *ducks*

[justabi.livejournal.com]

As sense of humor was stunted at age 8 and then warped in the dishwasher I really don't see actual funny jokes happening...

[nashmaveric.livejournal.com]

::pout:: I'm not good with funny jokes. ::perks up:: Wanna hear a silly one?! ::hopeful grin::

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Of course! I'd love to hear a silly joke!

[nashmaveric.livejournal.com]

Okay ::grin::

Ahem...knock knock

[katholicgrrl.livejournal.com]

Well,if you've got nothing better to do, maybe you'll find something here that will amuse:

http://www.infopt.demon.co.uk/gayhist.htm#erotica

Aleister Crowley was a nasty sod, but the article about him quotes a poem of his that I thought could have been written about William! Tee hee!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Who's there?

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I'll check it out after work! *hugs* You always send something interesting!

[nashmaveric.livejournal.com]

Cowgo!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Cowgo who?....

[nashmaveric.livejournal.com]

No silly, cow go mooooooooo.

See? Silly joke. Actually that's the lamest one I could think of ::grin::

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Heeee!Silly girl! You made me laugh!I'll use that at work all day now! Thanks!

[nashmaveric.livejournal.com]

::grin:: You're welcome!

::bounces:: I made you laugh! Woot!

[katholicgrrl.livejournal.com]

Aaakk! Must always try to remenmber to check dates first!

Aleister Crowley was five years old when William was turned! (of course with some of the weird Magick he got up to, there could have been time travel...) so William wouldn't have met him at a party. But Spike could have.

Isn't this lovely:

Boy of red lips, pale face, and golden hair,
Of dreamy eyes of love, and finger-tips
Rosy with youth, too fervid and too fair,
Boy of red lips.
How the fond ruby rapier glides and slips
'Twixt the white hills thou spreadest for me there;
How my red mouth immortal honey sips
From thy ripe kisses, and sucks nectar rare
When each the shrine of God Priapus clips
In hot mouth passionate more than man may bear,
Boy of red lips!

[graysong.livejournal.com]

rotflmao!!

OMG that was so funny! I'm still laughing!

BTW - you Dad is a goofball. And I think I love him! Frank Footer and Stein ... Frank 'n' Stein ... bwahahahahahahaha

[graysong.livejournal.com]

Stuck. Blocked. Zippo.Nada,nothing,blank, zilch.

*Stares into void where story used to be*

I think Clark, in typical selfish teenage angst, took off to Gotham, asked around and found Wayne Manor, then busted in to find out what the hell is going on. Cuz you know, being a teen he doesn't have a clear plan or anything, just a raging hard on (heh heh) to beat up the cheateee rather than the cheateer. If you pardon my spelling.

And I think when he gets to the Manor, he's zipping around at a furious pace looking for Bruce (and setting off all the nifty Wayne alarms, natch) that Bruce races back to the Manor in his bat suit ... and Clark catches him.

So naturally he's overawed OMG its BATMAN thats so cool that he actually calms down a bit to listen to the story ... uh not sure after that and sucks that again the boys are parted ... but thats the best I could do on short notice. Hope it helps!!

Also - here's a distraction *looks behind you, points* OMG what's that??? *steals your fries while you're not looking*

[justabi.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I've always liked him...

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

lol! Thank you *counts fries quickly.* Well, I like it--I like it a lot!
So, any--hey!! What's that!?! *steals cookies when your back is turned*

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

*goggle* my stars...that's pretty.I think you really need to write that--with your newly discovered porny skillz and all.Ahem.*waits*