Weird Stories

[roxy]

There are two amazing stories that I just can't read, though I plan to pull up my socks and read one of them, because when I left it, it was just getting, well, really horrible but I'm hoping it's going towards a better place. The story has a really amazing, well written young Sam who breaks my heart with how brave and how kind he manages to be under the most horrific circumstances. It's gone on quite a bit since I stepped back—I can a terrible wuss, my goodness, but really, I *swear*! I'm going to start reading it again because I miss this really well thought out bit of world-building and excellent characterization. It's by brosedshield and lavinialavender and it's called Freak Camp: A Monster By Any Other Name

The other one, I swear, I can't read it. It's very well known, Suite!verse by leonidaslion. It's astronomically triggering for me and I don't even know why. Reading it makes me break out in a sweat and my stomach cramp and I cringe for days after I read it. Or used to read it, I had to stop. I occasionally skim new installments to see if Dean has managed to kill himself yet because that would be a happy ending in my book. Seriously, that thing tips me into a depression that's ridiculous, and yet, I've read a ton of her stuff and not had it bother me like this one—in fact enjoyed it very much and recced stories to friends. I even tried writing my own Evil!Sam to see if I could kind of water down my reactions to this one but no dice. I just can't look into something that horrible and not want to reduce it to manageable bits, hah!

I wonder why these particular stories are too much for me. A few others have come close, but the writers have been kind enough to do a little hand holding for me and when I pushed myself I found that it wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be but man….

Do you have stories that you admire but can't read because of subject matter? I'm not talking about fic that's so…shall we say, rare…that it's unreadable; I mean good solid stories that are just emotionally overwhelming for you.

Let's see if LJ let's us answer each other.
Unrelated, I owe an answer to chemm80, who asked my opinion about Sir, and yes, I have thinky thoughts about Papa Winchester! Coming soon as I get them all together. ;)

Comments

[mdlaw.livejournal.com]

A Monster By Any Other Name has started its second book. If you start there you should be okay. m :)

[myownghost.livejournal.com]

in the SV fandom, there's a story that i love and reread from time to time precisely because it is triggering: rageprufrock's "Yellow Means Slow." it's so sad but so lyrical that i cry and cry, and i even wrote her to tell her why it affects me like that. she was lovely about it.

if i confess to you that i couldn't read your firebird story, will you hate me? i started it several times but couldn't get past the early chapters. it was too painful. not sure why, when i really liked The Dog, which was incredibly violent. sometimes it's impossible to figure out all the strange pockets in our psyches.

[orbiting-saturn.livejournal.com]

There's not a lot that I can't read, but there are some things that get a physical reaction from me, that gut-deep discomfort that has me cringing for days afterwards. Pretty much all Wincest written by ebolacrisis simply because it's written the way incest actually occurs in real life and doesn't romanticize it.

And then there was Last Angel on Earth by starkraves that I thought about for days and days and got a little nauseous every time. It's D/C, non-con, beautifully written but HORRIBLE content.

I've read both of the stories you mentioned here, or I guess you could say I'm still reading them. They are good stories, well-written, and yeah, they make me all squirmy with discomfort, BUT- They are too long! It feels like the authors are almost drawing out the stories unnecessarily to torture the readers and make them feel like there will never be a conclusion. Nothing against them or anything, I know a lot of people like things drawn out for maximum suspense, but not me. I only keep reading because once I start something I have to finish it.

[tabaqui]

Two stories i cannot and will not read. I loathe it when the evil!brother is actually evil enough to make the other one want to die, gah, and i kept dipping into the 'Monster' one hoping for story but it seemed all i got was torture and so, yeah, no.

Same reaction to 'Monster' you have to 'Suite' - makes me ill. I remember when it seemed there was a 'trend' for fic like that in the Buffy 'verse and how very much i loathed it.

*smishes you*

[frelling-tralk.livejournal.com]

I know what you mean about Suite!verse. Confession time is that I was/am really into it as it described Sam's descent, and early on when he was trying to convince Dean to love him again etc. But recent chapters have had the psychological torture of Dean become so extreme that it's practically impossible to find any redeeming qualities in Sam, or believe that he still loves his brother at all. And I remember one chaper had a tattoo or something (forgive me if I'm not getting the details exact, it's been a while!) where Dean was opening himself up to past memories of Sam and it seemed like a real turning point. Plus the hints of Casiel and angels coming to the rescue were there quite a while back as well.

But then in more recent chapers Dean lost the tattoo and Sam became more irredeemable than ever, so that it does start to feel like nothing is really progressing and they've going to be caught up in this depressing cycle for ever. I guess that it's harder with really long multi-chapter fic like that to not start to feel a bit gratuitous with the torture after a while...

I've been meaning to check out the other fic, but I've been thinking about waiting until all the chapters are complete first

[rednihilist.livejournal.com]

Never read the first one, so thanks for the rec. Second just updated, I saw, so, yeah, I'll have to go back to that one again sometime soon. Surprisingly not very triggery for me, or it is in such a way that I get a sick, masochistic thrill from it. That happens quite a bit for me with fanfic, especially slash, because authors love the non-con, and every one out of ten fics has some form or hint of child molestation. We are a sick bunch.

Also, hiya! I missed you. Did you miss me, Snuggles? XD

[twinsarein.livejournal.com]

Hey there. Cool post. I have two I can think of off the top of my head. Hoperoy has one I've never been able to read, although I've skimmed it, called Yesterday's Tomorrow, or something like that. The second one is actually one of yours, called Dog. I can't get past the scene where Lionel comes to take Clark from the Kents. You wrote it so well and so powerfully that it brings me to tears. By the time Martha is trying to put on a brave face for Clark, I have to stop. I'm getting misty-eyed just typing this out right now.

I'd have been fine if I'd read it before I had kids, but since I didn't even discover fantoms existed online until I was on maternity leave...so, yeah. I've become a complete wimp about things like that. There is stuff in the SpN fandom I stay away from, too, but I can't think of specific titles.