writing, drawing, and drugs and sex...

[roxy]

We call that the hook. *grins*



You know, as glad as I am that I'm no longer contemplating suicide once a month, thanks to no longer taking Paxil(or as it's also known, the DEVIL) I confess, I miss the flip side. That scarily good good GOOD mood I'd be in for a couple of days after. Geez, I miss it. I miss writing and thinking "HOLY SHIT! I'm a fucking GENIUS!!!" So much more satisfying than, "Hot damn, I don't suck all that much!"

When I compare writing to drawing, I'm much more satisfied with what I've written than anything I've ever drawn. Weird that. In fact, I can't point to any drawing I've ever done and call it good. The most I can say is okay. Maybe the color worked, or the line, or a shadow--
On the other hand, there are a couple of stories I've written I think are pretty good,and one or two I think are damn good.
That's right, I said it. I feel stupid now, but I'm not taking it back.

So the other night, I had a dream about a girl with a penis!! I know it!! Normally, I'd be all ick. But this dream was so odd. In this dream, I was at dinner with the Fam and flirting with my waitperson (as usual--I always flirt with the waitperson) who happened to be a cute girl (she looked sort of like Aisha Tyler—who personally I like but not enough to kiss, so that was odd) and way too young but in the dream I was younger too. Ah, black hair. I remember you... anyhoo, I somehow ended up in the garden of this restaurant with her and we were kissing and goodness, it was such a nice kiss. It really lingered--you know how you can feel your lips all warm from it for hours? It was like that. Nice. And then she said, look, and I looked down and there--my word. What a surprise. Nice looking dick, though. Sadly, I had to refuse. Married, after all.

So ther ewe have it, Sex, drugs-sort of. No rock and roll. sorry. *G*

Comments

[rhiannonhero.livejournal.com]

Why must I always remember that I'm married in my dreams? *sigh*

[rosy5000.livejournal.com]

The only thing you're missing is the roll... because you ROCK! ;D

And if it'll convince you, I'll tell ya every day that you are a genius and your stories are totally awesome. :D

[kristiinthedark.livejournal.com]

Hee. I had a dream not too long ago where *I* had a penis. Yeah, that was interesting. :D

[myownghost.livejournal.com]

paxil gave you "suicidal ideation," as they call it? did i already tell you that my son attempted suicide while on it? this was a couple of years before they started posting warnings about giving it to kids. that was a scary night. :/

[danceswithgary]

Wellbutrin - best stuff in the world!!!

Ahem.

So anyway, I would be hard-pressed to find anything you've written that I wouldn't recommend. So you must have the bad stuff hidden away somewhere?

And dream lovers? I gave up on them ever having anything but my husband's face whenever things got really good. My brain is obviously stuck on "There can be only one...". I shall spend the rest of my life wondering, 'cause there never was another. Hey, that sounds like a great country-western song. Hmmm.

[dawnybee.livejournal.com]

// Geez, I miss it. I miss writing and thinking "HOLY SHIT! I'm a fucking GENIUS!!!" //

You should always think that because you are. You should get a sheet of paper and write in huge block letters “I am a writing goddess” cos you are.

//So the other night, I had a dream about a girl with a penis!! //

Was her name Kimora Simmons? :)

// And then she said, look, and I looked down and there--my word. What a surprise.//

LMAO!!.

[lexii314.livejournal.com]

"and I looked down and there--my word. What a surprise. Nice looking dick, though. Sadly, I had to refuse. Married, after all"

It's a dream...GO FOR IT!!!
In my dreams I'm always the one with the dick. I guess that's why I'm so PISSED when I wake up :(

[jakrar.livejournal.com]

Paxil made you suicidal? *winces* I'm really sorry to hear that. (I take Paroxetine, which is generic Paxil, but I don't seem to contemplate suicide any more often than I did before the Paroxetine. And it definitely does help with the OCD.) I'm certainly glad you're no longer taking it, even if you no longer get the scarily good moods, either. *hugs you* But I hear fine chocolate in large quantity is renowned for bringing on good moods.

On the other hand, there are a couple of stories I've written I think are pretty good,and one or two I think are damn good.

Your writing IS damn good. So clearly, by recognizing that fact, you are simply showing good taste. *nods*

[tabaqui]

I never have dreams like that!
Sexy, i mean.
Weird, yes. But not sexy.
*is lame*

*twirls you*

[ladydreamer.livejournal.com]

It's good that I'm hearting these stories about the drugs. I have no idea what to expect when I go to the therapist. ;_;

When I compare writing to drawing, I'm much more satisfied with what I've written than anything I've ever drawn.
Ditto.

Wonderful dream.

[petit-rhino.livejournal.com]

Sadly, you can't get the highs without the lows (and hey, that sounded like platitude time!). My lows aren't bad enough that I'm willing to give up the highs though *keeps her fingers crossed*, so no drugs for me yet.

My dear, you have some weird dreams. Though I kinda had a similar one a few years back.

[nataliadarimini.livejournal.com]

Sounds a little like me. I would love to get rid of the suicidal part of my bipolar, but I don't think I could bear to go without the highs that come after.

Your writing

[(Anonymous)]

You should never doubt your writing skill! You have the ability, that belongs to only the best authors, to immediately grab your reader and make them invested in your characters. With elegant simplicity, you make us picture the events and feel the emotions. I particularly like the way you capture Clark's vulnerability, both to his own fears and insecurities, as well as the people and events around him. I usually read your stories several times, with the exception of The Dog. (I thought it was wonderfully done, but your portrayal of Clark's circumstances was so vivid that I can't bear experiencing it again.)

I am one of the silent masses who lurk LJ; I'm sure you have many, many more fans than those who so faithfully comment on your stories.