roxy | feeling sorry for myself, whining, blabbing, stuff like that

feeling sorry for myself, whining, blabbing, stuff like that

So, that time's rolled around again, when I'm all weepy and oy, woe is me, the world's unfair, everybody hates me, my pants are too tight, my chins are too many, what am I here for...well, that one I know--I'm here for the porn--but in the greater scheme of things, why me? And of course, since I'm a miserable bitch, I have to make my beloved's life miserable too, until he finally throws up his hands and wants to know what the heck is wrong with me? I just know one of these days he's going to have had enough and just walk away, just leave. (here's the part where I throw myself into a corner and sob all broken hearted) Yeah, you know what's really stupid and self-involved and stupid and pathetic about that? After 30 years, if he hasn't left me (or smothered me in my sleep, i can be *such* a god-awful bitch, just ask the children) more than likely he's just gonna ride this thing out until the final chapter. BUT IT FEELS LIKE IT MIGHT HAPPEN and I'm really feeling sorry for myself.

There. Now that I've typed all that out, I feel kind of better, thank you.

In a dizzying and complete change of subject, I'm thinking about posting all my old SV all cleaned up and shiny new over at my DW place. I've always hated the way my stuff looks at SSA, and folks keep having problems with it. Who knows, maybe some day someone will be looking for SV stuff to read and find my DWj and be all excited about the SV. It was so much fun when I first came into fandom and stumbled over stuff here and there--it was like finding gold! I've already started to post some stuff there, SpN and SV, with pretty pickchus. :) Also, it lets me feel like I'm doing something fannish. I have this problem though, with reading the stuff as I'm going along. Ha! Some of it's a good read--and some of it, omg. *hides face*

In case you want to see, my user name there is Roxy. I know, right? So bold, so creative!
So! Enough rambling. Whoever made it this far--you're the shizzle! High five, friend!*HUGHUG*

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*cuddles* Um, clearly you are here for me to snuggle and molest.

*happysigh*

I can think of no greater purpose... *g*

Why be anywhere but for the porn? And I'd be awfully lonely and with so much less Clitney to keep me happy without you. And of course you ever amusing posts about random things. You are one of the awesomest! ;) *huggles and snuggles and smooches* ♥

*clings to you like baby howler monkey*

Gaaaaaah, I'm so needy!!!

Thanks for feeding into that, my dearest. ;)

Aw, honey! I'm sorry you're blue-deviled, as they used to say in the Regency. What a crappy way to have a day, huh?

I like your posting idea. But how about the AO3? Or are you there already? I really like posting and reading there.

I hope you feel more upbeat pretty soon. I can't stand hearing anyone say such bad things about you--not even you!

Ach, my dear, you know in a day or two, I'll be making this post private and pretending like I never said a thing. *snort*
What, me worry?

I've read stories at the AO3, but don't know anything more about it. It's lovely there too, but looks beyond my shaky grasp of things technical.

YOU ARE THE SHIZZLE, TOO. ;D
*clings and hugs*

Feeling fannish is a good mood-lifter. I'm goin' over to check you out. xx

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! Your icon is SO EFFING CUTE!!!!!!

oh wow, it made me feel better!! *HUGS*

*GGG*

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silsbee329.livejournal.com - 2010-07-11 15:25 (UTC) - Expand

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roxymissrose.livejournal.com - 2010-07-11 18:29 (UTC) - Expand

*Sends you hugs*

Give us links when you're on DW, but I second the motion to put your stuff on Archive of our Own, too.

Here I am! me at DW (http://roxy.dreamwidth.org/)

And thanks, omg, for the hugs! I'm making myself feel better reading J2--it goes really well with a danish and a cup of coffee. I'm pretending that it's 3 in the afternoon instead of 3 at night... ;)

*cuddles up*

SUZ!! *waaaaaaaaaaah*!!!!!!

*clings*

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suzvoy.livejournal.com - 2010-07-11 10:26 (UTC) - Expand

what am I here for...well, that one I know--I'm here for the porn--but in the greater scheme of things, why me?

You are not just here for porn (although..thanks!) you're here to share of yourself which inspires others, gives us joy when we need it and you're none the wiser 'cos you're just being wonderful you.

Yeah, you know what's really stupid and self-involved and stupid and pathetic about that? After 30 years, if he hasn't left me (or smothered me in my sleep, i can be *such* a god-awful bitch, just ask the children) more than likely he's just gonna ride this thing out until the final chapter. BUT IT FEELS LIKE IT MIGHT HAPPEN and I'm really feeling sorry for myself.

Thirty years? Yeah, I think he's in it for the long haul ::hugs::

You won't let it get to that point anyway. He understands, he may not get it, but he understands and that's why he stays.

I swear to god, beloved, that man is a *saint*! What you say is so true--he might not get it but he understands. I wish I was better for him, but this is as good as it gets. I have to make up my shortcomings by being really, really cute. *koff*

And thank you, you always say the most incredibly wonderful things. Just you wait, one day there'll be a knock at your door...*eg*

What about making a huge pasta meal? You'll feel better physically because of, you know, that stuff the TV doctors says is good for your blood sugar when you're like this. Also, beloved will enjoy a huge pasta meal with you and he'll be happy, too. Something easy, though. Carbonara. That's not healthy, but man, it's good. Easy and good. And cheesy.

(But no sugar, that'll make you crash worse.) (I'm stocking up on packets of easy make Carbonara for the next week or so).

Ack! It's four in the morning and now, I'm *craving* pasta! But you know, that sounds like the perfect thing to make for dinner tomorrow--plus actually cooking might stir up the brain cells a bit. Not to mention shock the hell out of him. *G*

Excellent advice! I will do so!

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iibnf.livejournal.com - 2010-07-11 08:57 (UTC) - Expand

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roxymissrose.livejournal.com - 2010-07-11 09:29 (UTC) - Expand

i hope you're feeling much better by now! i'll add a hug to those above, anyway, because you deserve hugs. *hugs*

i'll go look at you at DW and, if i've not already fanned you there, do so at once.

*HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGS* THANK YOU!

I'm still a little grumpy, but not the kind of grumpy where we write emo notes and hide them under the placemats and contemplate the bus schedule and whether we can shove the coffeemaker into our bindle, so--win!

*huggles you*

You really need to try out AO3. I'll be happy to help you if you have questions. The editor is the best I've worked with for archiving and the stories can be posted all in one piece (like SSA), but can be edited if you're not happy with them. You can also include images, just like on LJ or DW.

I really do want to ask you questions about AO3. Everybody seems to like it. You know what horrible times I had with SSA, you walked me through it enough times so you know what a techno-boob I am! Patient woman that you are. ;)

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danceswithgary - 2010-07-11 19:00 (UTC) - Expand

Yeah, DW's great, but AO3, hon? You listen to danceswith and get your fine booty on over to that archive STAT. It's lovely, and easy-peasy!

I'm sorry you're feeling down, but just look at all the folks around here who love the stuffing out of you! *rallies around roxy* And while you're here for the porn (and admirable pursuit), I'm just here for the, uh, camaraderie?

Also, somewhat off-topic, but did you want to "talk" before the big meet n' greet in a few weeks? (Heh. That kinda rhymed.) Lemme know, either way, and quit doubting the Mister! I think he's fully invested in the long haul, from the sound of it, and adores you dearly. Like the rest of us, snookums. :) *Huggles*

YES! I do want to talk about the trip and the meet-up!

I've been meaning to message you, but I've been kind of slogging through feeling sorry for myself, gearing up for BG moving back home, and worrying about my dad and the way I've been screwing up his stuff. Oy! But don't be scared, it sounds worse than it is. ;)

The world would totally be porn-less without you and there would be no lulz. :( I don't want to live in that world.

**cuddles you tightly and smushes**

**calls Jared and tells him he and a honey bear need to show up at your door STAT!**

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

See Ferd? That's why you're the best!!! *leans on you, all happysighs*

Aw, Roxy. *pats*

DW = good.

I can't get the fucking admins to take my stuff down at SSA. I've now written several times in various ways. Christ. When someone asks for their shit to be taken down, take it the fuck down! Obvi, I am kind of pissed about this.

So, DW = good!

Sorry you're feeling crummy.

Thanks my dear, give me a day or two and I'll be dancing in the streets--well, running actually, folks don't seem to take kindly to a little tango in the intersection 'round here... ;)

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danceswithgary - 2010-07-11 19:02 (UTC) - Expand

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garryowen.livejournal.com - 2010-07-11 19:04 (UTC) - Expand

Ms. Roxy, we all have moments when we feel like we're not enough - good enough, smart enough, thin enough. If we're lucky, we have friends and loved ones around who can prop us back up when we sag.

*props you up*

There. If it gets uncomfortable, let me know. ;)

*tight hugs*

*leans*
Thank you love. I hate when that dark shadow that creeps up from time to time makes me forget that. God knows I'm luckier than I deserve. *HUGS*

Cheer up, little Johnny! Otherwise we'll have to give you the smile pills again!

But Daddy, I don't want--

Then I suggest you cheer the hell up in a god damn jiff. Now, go make Daddy another highball. And do it without crying--your tears dilute the booze.

Yeah, I dunno either. :D If you feel bad for Uncle Roxy, maybe you could do something unexpectedly nice for him. Just, for the love of God, don't tell me what the nice thing is.

ach, you sick and evol little biyatch, I'm so proud that you're mine. :) You always make me smile! *HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG*

Some days, life just sucks. But you're a tough cookie, Roxy, with a unique sense of humor. I think you'll be okay. *High fives, then hugs you*

*HUGS SO HARD*

Thanks, love, I'm still feeling a litle crumbly, but better now...(see what i did there? *G*)

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luvmax1.livejournal.com - 2010-07-12 21:46 (UTC) - Expand

Silly Roxy, you are here for me to nub you!

*snuggles*

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! 42 and everything!!!!

My life's purpose is clear now! *snuggles right back*

in the greater scheme of things, why me?
BECAUSE YOU MAKE US HAPPY!

LOL!

Best reason there can possibly be! *GGG*

*hugs*
I don't know if you have seen my posts lately, but I think that many posts will interest you. ;-)

Ooooo, I must go see--whenever you say that, it's always something that knocks my socks off! :)

Awwwww!
*luffs you muchly*

He'll never leave, bay-bee - you rock too much! Really truly!!
*smishes you*

I know...plus there's that little matter of the LoJack....

*HUGGLES*

;)

*gives you huggles* No man could be foolish enough to leave you, let alone the awesome Mr. Roxy!

And I think reposting the final versions of all your stories is a great idea. But maybe, for those of us who are internet-impaired, you could post a link? And how does one join DW, anyway?

Tell me what you think--I tried to make it as pretty as possible!

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jakrar.livejournal.com - 2010-07-23 10:39 (UTC) - Expand

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roxymissrose.livejournal.com - 2010-07-23 15:33 (UTC) - Expand

*HUGS* Hope you feel better soon!

Thanks so much beloved, I'm trying my best. Back to work tomorrow so that will either help a whole lot, or finish me off. *g*

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