Weird Stories

[roxy]

There are two amazing stories that I just can't read, though I plan to pull up my socks and read one of them, because when I left it, it was just getting, well, really horrible but I'm hoping it's going towards a better place. The story has a really amazing, well written young Sam who breaks my heart with how brave and how kind he manages to be under the most horrific circumstances. It's gone on quite a bit since I stepped back—I can a terrible wuss, my goodness, but really, I *swear*! I'm going to start reading it again because I miss this really well thought out bit of world-building and excellent characterization. It's by brosedshield and lavinialavender and it's called Freak Camp: A Monster By Any Other Name

The other one, I swear, I can't read it. It's very well known, Suite!verse by leonidaslion. It's astronomically triggering for me and I don't even know why. Reading it makes me break out in a sweat and my stomach cramp and I cringe for days after I read it. Or used to read it, I had to stop. I occasionally skim new installments to see if Dean has managed to kill himself yet because that would be a happy ending in my book. Seriously, that thing tips me into a depression that's ridiculous, and yet, I've read a ton of her stuff and not had it bother me like this one—in fact enjoyed it very much and recced stories to friends. I even tried writing my own Evil!Sam to see if I could kind of water down my reactions to this one but no dice. I just can't look into something that horrible and not want to reduce it to manageable bits, hah!

I wonder why these particular stories are too much for me. A few others have come close, but the writers have been kind enough to do a little hand holding for me and when I pushed myself I found that it wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be but man….

Do you have stories that you admire but can't read because of subject matter? I'm not talking about fic that's so…shall we say, rare…that it's unreadable; I mean good solid stories that are just emotionally overwhelming for you.

Let's see if LJ let's us answer each other.
Unrelated, I owe an answer to chemm80, who asked my opinion about Sir, and yes, I have thinky thoughts about Papa Winchester! Coming soon as I get them all together. ;)

Comments

[frelling-tralk.livejournal.com]

I know what you mean about Suite!verse. Confession time is that I was/am really into it as it described Sam's descent, and early on when he was trying to convince Dean to love him again etc. But recent chapters have had the psychological torture of Dean become so extreme that it's practically impossible to find any redeeming qualities in Sam, or believe that he still loves his brother at all. And I remember one chaper had a tattoo or something (forgive me if I'm not getting the details exact, it's been a while!) where Dean was opening himself up to past memories of Sam and it seemed like a real turning point. Plus the hints of Casiel and angels coming to the rescue were there quite a while back as well.

But then in more recent chapers Dean lost the tattoo and Sam became more irredeemable than ever, so that it does start to feel like nothing is really progressing and they've going to be caught up in this depressing cycle for ever. I guess that it's harder with really long multi-chapter fic like that to not start to feel a bit gratuitous with the torture after a while...

I've been meaning to check out the other fic, but I've been thinking about waiting until all the chapters are complete first

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I read--or actually skimmed--the last few updates because I thought that hope was coming for Dean but it seems not. I have checked out on Sam. I can't really talk in depth about this series, I've only ever dipped in and out of it, because it's too nerve-wracking for me. I've read almost everything *else* she's written because I enjoy the way she writes--she's written some of my favorite SpN stories, but man, reading that series is an act of masochism!

Freak Camp updates pretty regularly and they seem to have a definite end in mind and I'm thinking it's going to be upbeat. You know me and the happy ending! ;)