Top? Bottom?

[roxy]

I sent a note to sillie82 recently, because of an interesting comment in a post of mine. I thought I should share my wondering with you,'cause I'm nice like that.

The issue was warning for top/bottom. Now me, I don’t get why it matters. I like switching the best, maybe I'm just greedy. In years past, I would have really gotten steamed about being asked to warn for who tops or bottoms. Nowadays, I sort of get that it's not my judgment to make, and for some people, it's *very* important. I'm working like hell to be more open to other folks—so I'm going to try and remember to tag for that stuff.

A question to you all.

I get how you label Top Dean(or top whoever). That means of course, that Dean is fucking various characters, not being fucked. So, how do you label it if there's non-penetrative sex, but one is clearly the aggressor, for lack of a better word? Would the person instigating the sex be the top? Does it even apply in a situation like that?

What do you think? What tags would you like to see that folks don’t use enough? What tags should people stop using? I vote "this is crap I don’t even know". I do—NONCLICKY.

Comments

[phoenix1966]

Speaking for myself (and who else could I speak for?), who tops and bottoms is like a kink of mine. If I'm going to read a story that has explicit sex, then I'm going to look for ones that cater to my tastes and avoid ones that would have elements that I don't like. I can understand why an author would avoid the tag when who tops and bottoms would actually ruin a plot point, but if it doesn't ruin something (like who might end up an omega in a story), why wouldn't an author tag it? It doesn't ruin the story, takes only a moment and is a subject that does matter to some readers.

As for the specific example of aggressive behavior in a non-penetrative sexual encounter, I would probably tag the aggressive sexual partner as "toppy!".

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

As for the specific example of aggressive behavior in a non-penetrative sexual encounter, I would probably tag the aggressive sexual partner as "toppy!".

Ah! That's a good option!

I started out writing fanfic when no one warned for anything except character death and sometimes rape. There came a huge upheaval, concerning warnings and a writer's responsibility, and when the dust cleared, folks were much more likely to warn where they hadn't before. It made sense, in terms of triggering people. I do my best to be careful but sometimes, I just can't. Any writer wants to think their story is so damn good, so wonderful, people will be grateful to have read, even if it was outside their comfort zone. Which is crap, I know, because I can count on one hand the number of times I clicked on Dean/Cas.

At AO3, I am incredibly grateful for the tags, more than once, they have saved my eyes. I've learned my lesson, and now, I read the tag list to the bitter end! :D

[phoenix1966]

"Any writer wants to think their story is so damn good, so wonderful, people will be grateful to have read, even if it was outside their comfort zone. Which is crap, I know, because I can count on one hand the number of times I clicked on Dean/Cas."

I think for a lot of people, fanfiction is a form of controlled escapism. The reader wants to "get away from it all" for a while, but only in a specific fashion.

I am sure I have missed some absolutely amazing writing by not reading any Destiel, but that's just not something for me. And when it comes to fanfiction, I only want to escape so far and no farther.

[elwarre.livejournal.com]

I can count on one hand the number of times I clicked on Dean/Cas.

This is cracking me up, both because I'm totally the same, and also because A Trickle of Strangers is one of only two stories that have Dean/Cas as the primary pairing that I actually liked.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

hah! I'm forever doing something like that--Dean/Cas? Hell no! A Trickle of Strangers...Mpreg? Hell the fuck no! Ripley, Believe It Or Not, plus sequel...

I *adore* Three Kings verse, love it to bits, and it's Dean/Cas and practically porn-free and one of my fav series ever. I'm contrary like that--I earned it. :D :D :D

[elwarre.livejournal.com]

For the sake of any commenters who write Destiel, I should add that my issue isn't that I think it's bad, it's just that I hardly ever read it. I mostly just want to love on Sam.