Sekrit What?

I've given this a lot of thought(read: none at all) and have decided that from now on, my dear, dear friend, askellington will be performing beta duties for me. Some of you may know askellington They are kindness personified, generous to a fault, patient as the day is long, and an excellent gentle being. Why, I remember going to see the pope, and askellington happened to be there at the same time. I knew this because the crowd said, "Who's that old guy with askellington? askellington once rescued a basket of kittens from a raging house fire, and then turned them into unicorns and gave them to poor little orphan children. But not before knitting blankets from the hair of their manes to give to old ladies....I really need to start writing or get another hobby, yo.



( under the cut, a flattering picture of the author, and a plea for help )