Um. Now I really want that story. I'm totally picturing Patty wearing a ruffly apron and boxer shorts dancing around the three-square-foot kitchen in his and Dean's efficiency singing Madonna songs and making snickerdoodles that he won't let Dean eat (except maybe one or two he makes extra so Dean can steal one from the pile behind his back like Pat doesn't know how to count or something) while Dean is out in the alley on his knees sucking dick and hustling pool and looking in the trash on the street for cool stuff to bring home like their matching milk crate bedside tables and the tv that only gets channel 7 that Patty's planning to fix. They both pretend that Dean's job at the garage keeps them in food and rent, but they both know that Dean's job keeps Sammy in Stanford and Pat's job at the Hobby Lobby keeps Sammy in polo shirts and ipods. Dean is freakishly desperate for Pat's cock those days, like he needs to milk Patty's cock to go with the cookies and maybe Pat's new found interest in baking has something to do with that, but maybe it's just because Martha Stewart comes on channel 7 right after Oprah when Dean's shift at the garage is over but he won't be home for another three hours and Patty can't fucking think about it, can't think about whether Dean's lips are wrapped around somebody else's cock, or his dick is in some girl's cunt. Sometimes Patty makes pie, but only when he feels really pathetic, because those days Dean smiles at him like the sun and tells him he loves him and it makes Pat's heart hurt a too much to do it too often.
Sam and Chuck jerk off together watching Dark Angel sometimes, because Chuck thinks Alec looks like a gymnast. They like to wallow together. Sam doesn't share his cookies, though. One time Sam ate every cookie in the box in one sitting while drinking Canadian Club whiskey (it was cheap) and jerked off while crying so hard he barely made it to the bathroom before he started puking. He fell asleep in the shower and jerked off in the morning hung over and gross and hated himself for it, because despite the truly epic number of times he jerks off in a cookie day, he never, ever does it in the shower.
John totally drinks himself to death after a failed attempt to get Bobby to put out, because even though he would never sully the memory of Mary, he felt like gay sex would help him understand what the fuck happened to his boys. Alas, Bobby was not down and nearly drown John in a vat of holy water.
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4/15/09 07:59 am (UTC)Sam and Chuck jerk off together watching Dark Angel sometimes, because Chuck thinks Alec looks like a gymnast. They like to wallow together. Sam doesn't share his cookies, though. One time Sam ate every cookie in the box in one sitting while drinking Canadian Club whiskey (it was cheap) and jerked off while crying so hard he barely made it to the bathroom before he started puking. He fell asleep in the shower and jerked off in the morning hung over and gross and hated himself for it, because despite the truly epic number of times he jerks off in a cookie day, he never, ever does it in the shower.
John totally drinks himself to death after a failed attempt to get Bobby to put out, because even though he would never sully the memory of Mary, he felt like gay sex would help him understand what the fuck happened to his boys. Alas, Bobby was not down and nearly drown John in a vat of holy water.