SMALLVILLE,

5/16/04 11:14 pm
roxy: (Default)
[personal profile] roxy
Welcome to the Land of Denial.Rift, what rift? Join me as I take a walk through the fertile land of Clex....
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Clark had been so furious with his mother that he truly thought for a moment that his head was going to explode .How in the heck could she go to Lex of all people in the world! What in the world was she thinking?*How could she be so, so, thoughtless? Well sure, she didn’t know what had happened between Lex and him, but come on! He hadn’t talked to him or even mentioned his name in what? Two years? God! And then he puts him in some place halfway across the city away from him! Ok! Getting it, Mr. HetroMc.Straighty-Pants. Jeez like I might rape him if we were in the same spot. Oh, and let’s not even talk about the fact he took off before I even got back so I could turn him down in person…Or the fact I’m having a screaming fit with myself in my head,
Bastard! I’ll talk to him later. Right now, I want to find out how Mom got Dad to agree to this craziness.*
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The next week found Clark standing in the doorway of his “bachelor pad” as his Dad kept calling it. Clark had no idea why he thought it was so very amusing. He guessed it was just some kind of old folks thing. So here he was, with a key, a note, and that was about it. Lex hadn’t called or been there to meet him when he came into town. He’d sent the darn key in the mail. And not even to him, but to his Mom. Jeez, what an ignorant, egotistical jerk!
Clark decided not to spend another minute thinking about someone he couldn’t believe that he thought he’d been in love with when he was a teenager. An idiot teenager. It infuriated him that he still blushed hotly at the horrible mistake he’d made. He’d deluded himself into thinking Lex returned the feelings he had had at the time. Well, that wasn’t going to be a problem now. Or ever. Clark dropped the box he was carrying in the..hall, he guessed it was. Wow, at least the place was nice, really nice. It had a big open floor plan and lots of light. He walked around taking in the hardwood floors, and the kitchen, ‘ cool, food and everything.’ It even came with an entertainment system. He walked down the hall to the two bedrooms. He looked in the larger room and figured it must have been Lex’s when he’d lived there. There were linens on the bed, and he checked and saw that there was stuff in the bathroom, soap and plain white towels ‘probably cost more than everything I’m wearing now.’ There were even several types of shampoo and that made him snicker a bit. He poked about in the closet (empty) and in the drawers, (also empty) Finally Clark sat on the edge of the bed in his fully furnished and highly impersonal new apartment and cursed himself for feeling so disappointed that beyond doing a favor for his parents, Lex didn’t care about him at all. Jerk!
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It took nearly an hour for Lex to make his way to the apartment door. When he and Martha had set this up, Lex never thought for a second about the fact that he had somehow developed an unhealthy obsession with her son, who had a starring role in the increasingly more vivid fantasies that haunted him. When he’d been speaking with the Kents, his only concern was that they get Clark moved in and ready for his summer job within the week. It’d felt so comfortable, like it did when Clark was still in high school, and the boy who’d saved his life had become his best friend, an innocent, young and sweetly naïve. Clark had been a welcome respite from the type of people that he’d known in the city, the one’s who swore that they’d do anything for you, except do anything for you. But all the joy was sucked out of it when he realized he would at some point have to deal in person with a young man who had no reason to feel any warmth towards him.. What should he say to him? What could he say to him that wouldn’t be awkward? He knew from the reaction he’d gotten at the club, that Clark didn’t give a damn about him anymore. After all Clark was older now, definitely experienced. He’d seen the way his.. what?.. boyfriend had been wrapped around him, how they’d kissed. Clark must have been with a lot of really attractive guys since the last time they’d seen each other. God! Why was he so damn nervous? You’re acting like a fucking girl: grow up. It’s not like he’s going to spit on you. Maybe.Maybe we’ll be lucky and he’ll actually speak to us. Maybe we shouldn’t use we ‘cause it makes us sound insane.. Lex gently knocked his head against the doorframe *so fucked *and nearly fell through when the door was yanked open.
“Oh! Oh. It’s you’,” Clark said, giving Lex a very suspicious look. He seemed to fill the whole doorway, not quite looming out of it and definitely giving the impression he’d rather close it again.

“ It’s me,” Lex smiled, or at least hoped the expression on his face could pass for one. Clark didn’t look too impressed, glaring at Lex, but then he seemed to shake himself and stood aside, making a motion for Lex to come in, “Sorry, please come in, I didn’t mean to be rude,” he said with a complete lack of sincerity.” Of course, seeing how this is your place and I’m sure you have a key, I guess I don’t really need to invite you in, do I?” He stomped off towards the kitchen as Lex came in and shut the door behind him.
‘Well. That went much better then I expected. I think. And now what?… Oh, Clark, by the way remember when I threw you out after you made a pass at me, lo those many years ago? Well, and this is the funny part, it turns out maybe I’m gay after all! And I hate my inner voice beyond all reason’, he sighed to himself.
Clark heard the sigh and spun around, fixing Lex with a hard look.”Is there something wrong?” he asked”Did I do something wrong here?” Lex wondered how things could get worse then they were now. “No Clark, not at all. Look, I want you to think of this as your place for the entire time you’re here, ok?” He placed a set of keys on a low table. “ These are the only other keys to the place. I’m leaving them with you and you can do with them, as you will. There is a problem however.”
Clark snorted, waiting for the ax, the big thing. The “No Guys In Here “ speech. Skinny little pale ass homophobe.’
“I told your mother that there’d be a housekeeper in the apartment with you. Kind of a den mother” Lex grinned, “ But that’s not going to be possible, so, you’re on your own. It’s up to you to be responsible. I’m sure you’ll do just fine on your own And, I’ll be checking on you from time to time. “

“Oh really? Well, I don’t want to be a bother! And I really don’t need a babysitter!” He knew he was lashing out at Lex, but frankly it felt good to let out some of the anger he’d harbored for so long at him. He turned to enjoy his mini- triumph, but when Clark looked at Lex, he was surprised by the expression on his face. He looked kind of tired and sad, and Clark thought that maybe he could…should, lighten up a bit. After all, the man probably barely remembered his complete and utter humiliation at his hands… Well, ok, probably not the right direction to go at this point…” Look, Lex, I’m really grateful for what you’re doing for us. Really. Sit, and have some..” He looked in the fridge.” Hmm, water or OJ?” He looked back At Lex and gave him the big smile.
“ Oh… water..” Lex blurted out the first thing in his mind, most of which was occupied in committing that smile to memory. God, the kid was so beautiful. What kind of screwy evil fate would make him want Clark long after the boy could care less about him? It was fucked up beyond compare …in that moment Lex decided that he was going to make Clark his. No matter what it took. Luthors always win. Except when they didn’t. But this was going to happen. He would make it happen.
Clark sat a bottle of water and a glass down next to Lex .He debated pouring it for him, but figured Lex didn’t deserve that from him. And no, he wasn’t being petty. Clark’s eyes narrowed as he looked at him. There was definitely something going on here, some strange undercurrent. Could Lex be afraid to be alone with him? Maybe he should assure him that wild horses couldn’t get him to touch his scrawny little ass, ever again in this lifetime, cute as it was…’*Shit*! Oops! Darn…’ Clark sat across the table from Lex and sipped at his orange juice. Lex sipped at his water. The silence began to stretch out more than was comfortable, and finally Lex broke.
“ So, your mother mentioned a boyfriend?” Lex knew immediately that was not the thing to have said. Clark shot to his feet and turned to the sink, narrowly avoided crimping the stainless steel when he held on to it, “What, you mean my mother and you didn’t discuss my whole life? She didn’t tell you I’m “single” now? I’m shocked!” Clark threw himself back down on his chair.
Lex stood and put his glass gently in the sink. He moved back to the front door and turned to face Clark.
“Clark. You’ve made it plain that you’d rather I wasn’t here. I apologize. I really was trying to be helpful, and I’m sorry about your friend. I think I’ll just let myself out. Please call me if you need …anything” He gave Clark a little half smile and eased out the door. He was gone so quietly and quickly that Clark didn’t have time to react. He sat staring at the door, his mouth slightly open, and his fingers made the edge of the table creak.
“That, that JERK! He’s doing it again! He’s being all sexy! Slinking to the door, that stupid head tilt, stupid, stupid smile and..” Clark leaned his head on the table and sighed. He could feel tears pricking his eyes and his chest hurt ‘ It still hurts. Two years, and it still hurts too damn much.’ Maybe, maybe it would be better to at least try to be his friend? Clark wasn’t sure if he could do that but he was going to try. He’d managed it with Mark and with Whitney and God knows holding on to this grudge was more painful than letting it go, he figured. He needed
to get himself together, be the person he was raised to be. Lex was back in his life for good or ill, and it was up to him to make the most of it.
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“Hello, Lex? Jeez I hate talking on answering machines…anyway hi, I mean it’s me…um… Clark. Yeah, uh, if you’re not busy this Saturday, like that’s possible I’m sure, heh, maybe you’d like to come over and watch a movie, if you’re not busy….I’m kinda babbling hunh? Give me a call, bye!”
Lex was proud of the fact that he only played the message four or five times before erasing it. Luthors had self-control after all. He had no idea what brought about this incredible change in behavior on Clark’s part but there was no way he was going to waste this opportunity. Oh, you bet he’d be there tomorrow. He shifted about the bed, pulling the sheets up, pushing them down. He punched his pillow viciously and bunched it up under his head. He couldn’t get comfortable. Thoughts of being with Clark were making him nervous and he resented feeling like a kid before a first date. He tried to relax, tried to remember how it had felt when Clark had kissed him, but all that came to mind was the look on the boy’s face, stunned and wide open and filled with pain, all because he couldn’t tell the truth to Clark or himself then. He’d been attracted to him from the first, he’d flirted shamelessly with him and then tried to convince himself it meant nothing because he flirted with everyone. But he didn’t have dreams about anyone like he had about Clark, dreams that woke him out of sleep, with hot tears running down his face and his head pounding from crying so hard while he slept. Even worse were the dreams in which he’d kissed Clark back instead of running, the one’s that were so full of joy, contenment, that he felt physically ill when he woke, the sense of loss so strong that all he could do was lay there, just lay there and try not to hate himself. Somehow, he’d been given another chance, a chance to make things right, to make Clark his, and he was going to make the most of it.
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Clark lay back on the bed, twisting and turning for what felt like hours now, sleep seeming to be just at the corner of his mind, but every time he actually began to drift off Lex’s face would snap him back to wakefulness. ‘Oh my God, what the heck was I thinking? What if I do something stupid, or say something dumb? What do we talk about? Hey Lex, how’s that homophobia coming? Jeez, I need to stop that too!’ He stared up at the ceiling, idly switching back and forth between watching the skeletons on the floor above watch TV, to staring at the crevices in the textured ceiling. His thoughts wandered back to Lex, wondering what he was doing now, on the phone on business maybe? He figured CEO types did that all the time, call all over the world on important matters, anyway they did it in the movies. He imagined Lex on the phone, looking serious and kind of sexy, the room lit just by his desk lamp, and no sound, because everyone else has gone home. He’d have his jacket and tie off, and his sleeves rolled up, because it’s night now, he’s a little tired, so tired that he doesn’t hear the door open and close softly, doesn’t know until he’s right behind him that he’s no longer alone. Clark imagined himself running his hands up Lex’s sides and Lex pressing back into the caress, a little hum of pleasure vibrating in his chest. “Clark…” He pictures himself pulling the shirt out of his pants and running his fingers under the waistband, stroking the smooth warm flesh there, pushing down a little farther as Lex arches back against him. Lex reaches behind him pulls his hips hard against him and rubs, rotating his hips and Clark is getting hard, groaning against Lex’s neck... his hand is on Lex’s dick, hot, and hard and velvety on his palm. His breath begins to catch, and he strokes a little firmer .Lex jerks and moans, begging Clark for more..
Clark is flying on the fantasy, he strokes himself harder, pants louder as he moves closer to climax, and then it hits him, his back arches till only his head and toes touch the bed and then he’s above the bed, floating and rocking slightly in the air in the aftermath of coming. It was a good feeling, not to be in control for a few minutes. Clark sighed as he grounded himself. He remembered that he could never really relax that way with Mark. Any evidence of him being alien freaked him out too much. Sometimes Clark thought Mark’s ability to keep his secret wasn’t so much devotion as total repression. Mark was a good guy, though. Just not everyone could handle this stuff. Pete had had a hard time with it too, and he was a really strong person. Could Lex deal with it? He was probably pretty tough…not that it even bore thinking about. Clark turned on his side and pulled the pillow over his head. God, I just need a little sleep! Please don’t let Lex keep hounding me…

In other news, work so sucked like a big sucking thing...

(no subject)

5/17/04 04:55 am (UTC)
tabaqui: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] tabaqui
The dam on the river of de Nile has BROKEN! WHoot!
Lurve me a little late-night fantasy. :)

Work ALWAYS sucus. Poor Roxy. *pets you* Did you at least get to be rude to somebody?

(no subject)

5/17/04 05:05 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] roxymissrose.livejournal.com
Heh! No, today I had my nice girl face on.Even though one of my co-workers told me I needed Jesus.She kind of ruined it by laughing really hard....
Look, is that a barge coming up the Nile? nooo, just a sex scene..