Brothers And Heroes (stab-stab-stab)
3/1/06 10:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
roxyThe Previous Parts are parked at a rest stop taking a little break, and the driver. Next stop, Mikey's house! Unless they max my cards out first...who needs twenty pair of lace up see through thongs....
So, posting because if I re-write this bitch one more time I'll stab it to death and then myself. I'm still working on the rest but with any luck this will kick it loose. On the Big Bang front, omgosh, the other day, he totally made my head go all exorcist-like, he did this incredible thing where...oh, goodness--wrong big bang. I meant to say, that's going great!
Summer was grinding to a sticky end, the days were thick and gluey, and the nights not much better. Lex was restless and jittery, not quite sure why. An unsettling feeling of almost constant longing made him wish for Excelsior and what was, even made him attempt to contact Vic. Vic seemed to have dropped off the face of the earth. After that letter earlier in the summer, no word had come again. Try as he might, he couldn’t find her. She might as well not have existed.
One night, right before dawn, in a fit of desperation or temporary insanity, he called Harry’s house, and listened to his father shout “Who is this” for a few long minutes before hanging up and going upstairs to lay on the floor in his room, staring without blinking at the ceiling until his eyes ached and burned.
He took to walking around the farm at night, certain that Uncle Jon’s security measures made it safe to do so. He cared a little less about safety anyways these days. He just wanted relief from the horrible energy that filled him up all night after night.
He’d even developed a routine, strolling along the paths through the gardens and through the orchards, the same path every night. He knew it so well he rarely used the little flash tucked in his back pocket.
This night he turned over and over in his mind what happened this summer. He skidded over thoughts of Harry. He was really was going to take the time to think about it, to take it apart and look at it from all angles and try to figure out why it hurt so much and at the same time seemed so distant and unreal. He just couldn’t at this moment. At this moment all he wanted was to go to Princeton, get away from Dad and just…get away. This was his chance to reinvent himself. Get away from everything that was holding him down.
He rolled his neck and tried to stretch the tension out of his shoulders. This avenue of thought was counter-productive to relaxation. He snorted. Yeah. Very much so. He moved on until he was walking along the fence that surrounded the herb garden and lingered in one spot, inhaling. He loved the scents that filled his nose. Sage and basil and oregano—every plant here had been carefully placed and set and he could clearly see Bruce’s hand in it.
Earlier in his walks, he’d begun to feel a presence…he could feel Bruce behind him sometime, following him like a ghost. Sometimes he wanted to tell Bruce to leave him alone but sometimes it was comforting, that ghost hovering around him…what did he used to call him? Spooky? He could barely remember why they’d called each other that, something about Bruce being such a tough guy and he was…Casper. That’s who they were, Spooky and Casper, best friends forever, until Clark took over their lives. He sighed to himself. Until Clark made their lives better, he meant, because he did. Clark was the glue that helped to patch up the painful parts of all their lives.
Poor Clark, growing up and no one noticing, still treating him like the little boy he’d been than. Treating him like an infant until he had to kick and scream so that they’d notice he wasn’t a baby anymore.
He stopped and leaned against the fence around the herb garden, He picked at the rustic style fence, peeling off slivers of rough wood and wondered how he was going to survive the next few days. When he left, maybe he shouldn’t come back again.
The shadows around him thickened, and then Bruce was standing next to him saying, “Please don’t leave us,” and Lex wondered for a moment if he’d said it aloud.
Bruce touched him so lightly on the shoulder he could barely feel it and again asked him not to leave.
Lex turned to him, studying what he could see of his face in the dim light. “I have to, don’t I--school starts soon, and there’s still a lot I need to do--”
Bruce shook his head. “I don’t mean that. Every night you walk around out here, wandering farther and farther away. You know, sometimes I follow you.”
Lex smiled a little at that, and Bruce went on. “I’ve been following you because you scare me. I’m afraid that…. I’m afraid you might...try to leave…”
Oh! Oh... Lex said. “*Hell* no! I’d never do that, that’s--” and he stopped, angry, angrier than he’d been all summer long. He was shaking with fury when he snapped, “I would never do that to the people I love. Never!”
“Okay, okay. I should have known that. It’s just— I feel I pushed you—hard. I was afraid…maybe too much.”
Lex was surprised that Bruce could even think like that. “I had no idea that you were given to introspection, Bruce. Trust me, if I could make it through everything I’ve had to deal with already, I think I can survive you,” he said sarcastically, “It is good to know you care.”
Bruce flushed. “That’s you being an asshole, isn’t it?” Bruce asked. “Fine, I deserve it.”
They were quiet for a while and Bruce cleared his throat and said, “Clark is too young. I think. I mean…”
Lex leaned away from Bruce and stared at him. “Clark? Where the fuck did that come from? How does Clark even enter into this?” He tried for outrage but felt his face burn, remembering with embarrassment his pathetic attempt to justify to himself why it would be okay to…to touch Clark.
“Never mind, forget I said anything.” Bruce sighed. “Life gets more and more complicated. I wish it were as simple as this.” He made a sweeping motion of his hand as he spoke, taking in the gardens, and Lex stared at him.
Simple? He looked down on the intertwining pattern the herbs grew in, in the moonlight the plants were mostly shades of gray and black and Lex snorted softly. Only Bruce would look at this complicated…thing…and see simplicity. “Really, what about Clark?”
Bruce leaned harder on the fence. “Clark has been…in love with you from the very beginning of time I think. I thought it was some little kid crush, some hero-worship thing. But…”
He stared at Lex and Lex could see that he was working himself up to say something that maybe was too hard to speak aloud. Lex took pity on him, put his hand on his arm; meaning to stop him and Bruce seemed to gain strength from the touch instead. “I’m jealous of that—so jealous that sometimes it makes me sick, makes me do things that I’m ashamed of.” He snapped his head up and said quickly, “I’m not ashamed of you—damn, I don’t mean it like that sounds. I’m sorry for what I forced you into. I did, didn’t I?” he asked.
Lex swallowed, “well, no—I didn’t tell you to stop, not really…”
“But the way you are with me isn’t really you, is it. I think you were punishing yourself maybe--like you thought you weren’t supposed to want anyone after Harry? And then Clark was there and you’re…you’re a good guy. You felt bad about how you felt. So you let me. Do what I wanted.”
Lex laughed, a little high and wild. “I’m hardly the person you think I am; don’t you remember why I almost got kicked out of school? It wasn’t ‘cause I’m such a good guy.”
Bruce shook his head sharply. “Doesn’t matter. You are a good guy whether you believe it or not.” He looked hard at Lex. “Don’t ever let anyone tell you different Lex. I *know* you’re a good guy. I *know* you wouldn’t hurt Clark. Not like that fucking bastard Sean.”
Lex was instantly furious. “Are you sure Clark’s okay, you’re positive?”
“Yeah, just confused I guess, a little shook. Mostly because of me, I think. Sean just—he’s a mutt, that’s all. He’s not a total creep,” he said a little doubtfully. “Besides, I scared the crap out of him.” He said, a little firmer.
Lex threw an arm over Bruce’s shoulder and said “Clark’s a lot tougher than we give him credit for, more resilient. Maybe I should speak to him though, let him know that I love him too. Just not like that.”
Bruce looked at him wryly. “So, what—you’re going to lie to him?”
Lex sighed. “Do I have a choice?”
Bruce shrugged. He pressed gently at Lex, moving him back from the fence. “We better head in, it’s going to be light soon, and I’m helping at the plant this morning.”
Lex nodded and stepped back. He looked up at the still dark sky, a few stars glimmering in the blackness and then at Bruce. “It’s my turn.”
“Okaa-ay,” he said and gave Lex a puzzled look. “Your turn. For what?”
Lex smiled, held out his hand.
Bruce looked at Lex, his hand, felt a decision rather than made it. He let Lex take his hand.
Lex pulled him closer, put his hands in his hair and smoothed it down, stroked lower, clasped hands on the back of his neck. His breath was a warm stream against his cheek, bent his head to him and bit his neck, worried tender skin between his teeth until Bruce was panting slightly. This was different, the whole feel of it was so different---he hadn’t touched Lex yet, hadn’t moved and he was so hard.
He reached for Lex, brushed fingertips against him and felt he was just as hard as he was. Lex whispered slowly and clearly, “Suck my dick.”
Bruce groaned. “Oh no. I can’t.” His knees were trembling, Lex licked his ear, fucked it with his tongue and scraped nails over his tee-shirt, teasing his nipples until even the touch of the cloth was too much. It was torture—and it was perfect. When Lex scraped his nails next along the length of his erection he shivered and grunted, locked his knees so he wouldn’t move and when Lex dropped his hand, Bruce whined in disappointment until he felt confident fingers move over his skin, up the inside of his thighs, sticky and hot and so exciting because Lex wanted to touch him, Lex slowly edged fingers up the legs of his shorts until he was touching him, feathery touches over his balls, fingers sliding back and just pressing the suddenly sensitive opening, and he whispered again in Bruce’s ear “Do what I tell you to do,” and a clear vision of Harry getting fucked from behind, Lex in him and fucking him hard filled Bruce’s mind. “No, I can’t, I can’t…”
“Don’t tell me you can’t.” One hand went to his hip--jerked Bruce closer, now fingers circled squeezed his dick, thumbed the tip, slid thick warm fluid around the crown and he said again, “Suck my dick.” and Bruce howled, “I can’t—if I move--” Lex squeezed and Bruce came so hard he felt like he was dying, come splattered his stomach, Lex’s hand, dripped and ran down his leg. He folded, dropped forward and hung in Lex’s arms. Lex held him close, one hand on his neck and the other hand…Bruce shuddered again as he watched Lex lick it clean from the corner of his eye. Lex wiped it dry on Bruce’s tee-shirt and Bruce grinned weakly.Figures.
Lex smiled. “That’s a little more like me.”
Bruce nodded, his head still tucked on Lex’s shoulder. He drew a deep breath and dropped to his knees. Lex started to hold him back, but Bruce batted his hands away, and pulled down on Lex shorts legs as he slid to the ground until his dick popped free of the elastic band. Bruce grinned and grabbed it, rubbed the velvety heat across his lips.
He watched Lex watch him, slid it in and out of his mouth, loving the stretch of his lips around the thick length, stopping to suck and lick broad stripes over the smooth head, over and over because it felt so good and when Lex began to whine in frustration, he swallowed, forced his dick down as deep as he could—Lex came, sharp quick thrusts into his throat, sharp cries that Bruce knew would carry on the morning air, by the time they’d both stopped shivering and groaning, gray light lit the fields and was chased by hazy salmon peeking at the horizon.
Lex grabbed a handful of his hair, and used it to pull him away from his dick. He looked down into his face. “Fuck…” Bruce moaned, touching his swollen mouth gently.
“Yeah,” Lex said and kissed him, a soft lick of his tongue against the heat and tenderness of his lips. Bruce smiled. And winced a bit. His lips felt hot and swollen and when he licked them and looked at Lex, it made his dick twitch. It was a little painful, and it was entirely good.
yeslord, continue.
So, posting because if I re-write this bitch one more time I'll stab it to death and then myself. I'm still working on the rest but with any luck this will kick it loose. On the Big Bang front, omgosh, the other day, he totally made my head go all exorcist-like, he did this incredible thing where...oh, goodness--wrong big bang. I meant to say, that's going great!
Summer was grinding to a sticky end, the days were thick and gluey, and the nights not much better. Lex was restless and jittery, not quite sure why. An unsettling feeling of almost constant longing made him wish for Excelsior and what was, even made him attempt to contact Vic. Vic seemed to have dropped off the face of the earth. After that letter earlier in the summer, no word had come again. Try as he might, he couldn’t find her. She might as well not have existed.
One night, right before dawn, in a fit of desperation or temporary insanity, he called Harry’s house, and listened to his father shout “Who is this” for a few long minutes before hanging up and going upstairs to lay on the floor in his room, staring without blinking at the ceiling until his eyes ached and burned.
He took to walking around the farm at night, certain that Uncle Jon’s security measures made it safe to do so. He cared a little less about safety anyways these days. He just wanted relief from the horrible energy that filled him up all night after night.
He’d even developed a routine, strolling along the paths through the gardens and through the orchards, the same path every night. He knew it so well he rarely used the little flash tucked in his back pocket.
This night he turned over and over in his mind what happened this summer. He skidded over thoughts of Harry. He was really was going to take the time to think about it, to take it apart and look at it from all angles and try to figure out why it hurt so much and at the same time seemed so distant and unreal. He just couldn’t at this moment. At this moment all he wanted was to go to Princeton, get away from Dad and just…get away. This was his chance to reinvent himself. Get away from everything that was holding him down.
He rolled his neck and tried to stretch the tension out of his shoulders. This avenue of thought was counter-productive to relaxation. He snorted. Yeah. Very much so. He moved on until he was walking along the fence that surrounded the herb garden and lingered in one spot, inhaling. He loved the scents that filled his nose. Sage and basil and oregano—every plant here had been carefully placed and set and he could clearly see Bruce’s hand in it.
Earlier in his walks, he’d begun to feel a presence…he could feel Bruce behind him sometime, following him like a ghost. Sometimes he wanted to tell Bruce to leave him alone but sometimes it was comforting, that ghost hovering around him…what did he used to call him? Spooky? He could barely remember why they’d called each other that, something about Bruce being such a tough guy and he was…Casper. That’s who they were, Spooky and Casper, best friends forever, until Clark took over their lives. He sighed to himself. Until Clark made their lives better, he meant, because he did. Clark was the glue that helped to patch up the painful parts of all their lives.
Poor Clark, growing up and no one noticing, still treating him like the little boy he’d been than. Treating him like an infant until he had to kick and scream so that they’d notice he wasn’t a baby anymore.
He stopped and leaned against the fence around the herb garden, He picked at the rustic style fence, peeling off slivers of rough wood and wondered how he was going to survive the next few days. When he left, maybe he shouldn’t come back again.
The shadows around him thickened, and then Bruce was standing next to him saying, “Please don’t leave us,” and Lex wondered for a moment if he’d said it aloud.
Bruce touched him so lightly on the shoulder he could barely feel it and again asked him not to leave.
Lex turned to him, studying what he could see of his face in the dim light. “I have to, don’t I--school starts soon, and there’s still a lot I need to do--”
Bruce shook his head. “I don’t mean that. Every night you walk around out here, wandering farther and farther away. You know, sometimes I follow you.”
Lex smiled a little at that, and Bruce went on. “I’ve been following you because you scare me. I’m afraid that…. I’m afraid you might...try to leave…”
Oh! Oh... Lex said. “*Hell* no! I’d never do that, that’s--” and he stopped, angry, angrier than he’d been all summer long. He was shaking with fury when he snapped, “I would never do that to the people I love. Never!”
“Okay, okay. I should have known that. It’s just— I feel I pushed you—hard. I was afraid…maybe too much.”
Lex was surprised that Bruce could even think like that. “I had no idea that you were given to introspection, Bruce. Trust me, if I could make it through everything I’ve had to deal with already, I think I can survive you,” he said sarcastically, “It is good to know you care.”
Bruce flushed. “That’s you being an asshole, isn’t it?” Bruce asked. “Fine, I deserve it.”
They were quiet for a while and Bruce cleared his throat and said, “Clark is too young. I think. I mean…”
Lex leaned away from Bruce and stared at him. “Clark? Where the fuck did that come from? How does Clark even enter into this?” He tried for outrage but felt his face burn, remembering with embarrassment his pathetic attempt to justify to himself why it would be okay to…to touch Clark.
“Never mind, forget I said anything.” Bruce sighed. “Life gets more and more complicated. I wish it were as simple as this.” He made a sweeping motion of his hand as he spoke, taking in the gardens, and Lex stared at him.
Simple? He looked down on the intertwining pattern the herbs grew in, in the moonlight the plants were mostly shades of gray and black and Lex snorted softly. Only Bruce would look at this complicated…thing…and see simplicity. “Really, what about Clark?”
Bruce leaned harder on the fence. “Clark has been…in love with you from the very beginning of time I think. I thought it was some little kid crush, some hero-worship thing. But…”
He stared at Lex and Lex could see that he was working himself up to say something that maybe was too hard to speak aloud. Lex took pity on him, put his hand on his arm; meaning to stop him and Bruce seemed to gain strength from the touch instead. “I’m jealous of that—so jealous that sometimes it makes me sick, makes me do things that I’m ashamed of.” He snapped his head up and said quickly, “I’m not ashamed of you—damn, I don’t mean it like that sounds. I’m sorry for what I forced you into. I did, didn’t I?” he asked.
Lex swallowed, “well, no—I didn’t tell you to stop, not really…”
“But the way you are with me isn’t really you, is it. I think you were punishing yourself maybe--like you thought you weren’t supposed to want anyone after Harry? And then Clark was there and you’re…you’re a good guy. You felt bad about how you felt. So you let me. Do what I wanted.”
Lex laughed, a little high and wild. “I’m hardly the person you think I am; don’t you remember why I almost got kicked out of school? It wasn’t ‘cause I’m such a good guy.”
Bruce shook his head sharply. “Doesn’t matter. You are a good guy whether you believe it or not.” He looked hard at Lex. “Don’t ever let anyone tell you different Lex. I *know* you’re a good guy. I *know* you wouldn’t hurt Clark. Not like that fucking bastard Sean.”
Lex was instantly furious. “Are you sure Clark’s okay, you’re positive?”
“Yeah, just confused I guess, a little shook. Mostly because of me, I think. Sean just—he’s a mutt, that’s all. He’s not a total creep,” he said a little doubtfully. “Besides, I scared the crap out of him.” He said, a little firmer.
Lex threw an arm over Bruce’s shoulder and said “Clark’s a lot tougher than we give him credit for, more resilient. Maybe I should speak to him though, let him know that I love him too. Just not like that.”
Bruce looked at him wryly. “So, what—you’re going to lie to him?”
Lex sighed. “Do I have a choice?”
Bruce shrugged. He pressed gently at Lex, moving him back from the fence. “We better head in, it’s going to be light soon, and I’m helping at the plant this morning.”
Lex nodded and stepped back. He looked up at the still dark sky, a few stars glimmering in the blackness and then at Bruce. “It’s my turn.”
“Okaa-ay,” he said and gave Lex a puzzled look. “Your turn. For what?”
Lex smiled, held out his hand.
Bruce looked at Lex, his hand, felt a decision rather than made it. He let Lex take his hand.
Lex pulled him closer, put his hands in his hair and smoothed it down, stroked lower, clasped hands on the back of his neck. His breath was a warm stream against his cheek, bent his head to him and bit his neck, worried tender skin between his teeth until Bruce was panting slightly. This was different, the whole feel of it was so different---he hadn’t touched Lex yet, hadn’t moved and he was so hard.
He reached for Lex, brushed fingertips against him and felt he was just as hard as he was. Lex whispered slowly and clearly, “Suck my dick.”
Bruce groaned. “Oh no. I can’t.” His knees were trembling, Lex licked his ear, fucked it with his tongue and scraped nails over his tee-shirt, teasing his nipples until even the touch of the cloth was too much. It was torture—and it was perfect. When Lex scraped his nails next along the length of his erection he shivered and grunted, locked his knees so he wouldn’t move and when Lex dropped his hand, Bruce whined in disappointment until he felt confident fingers move over his skin, up the inside of his thighs, sticky and hot and so exciting because Lex wanted to touch him, Lex slowly edged fingers up the legs of his shorts until he was touching him, feathery touches over his balls, fingers sliding back and just pressing the suddenly sensitive opening, and he whispered again in Bruce’s ear “Do what I tell you to do,” and a clear vision of Harry getting fucked from behind, Lex in him and fucking him hard filled Bruce’s mind. “No, I can’t, I can’t…”
“Don’t tell me you can’t.” One hand went to his hip--jerked Bruce closer, now fingers circled squeezed his dick, thumbed the tip, slid thick warm fluid around the crown and he said again, “Suck my dick.” and Bruce howled, “I can’t—if I move--” Lex squeezed and Bruce came so hard he felt like he was dying, come splattered his stomach, Lex’s hand, dripped and ran down his leg. He folded, dropped forward and hung in Lex’s arms. Lex held him close, one hand on his neck and the other hand…Bruce shuddered again as he watched Lex lick it clean from the corner of his eye. Lex wiped it dry on Bruce’s tee-shirt and Bruce grinned weakly.Figures.
Lex smiled. “That’s a little more like me.”
Bruce nodded, his head still tucked on Lex’s shoulder. He drew a deep breath and dropped to his knees. Lex started to hold him back, but Bruce batted his hands away, and pulled down on Lex shorts legs as he slid to the ground until his dick popped free of the elastic band. Bruce grinned and grabbed it, rubbed the velvety heat across his lips.
He watched Lex watch him, slid it in and out of his mouth, loving the stretch of his lips around the thick length, stopping to suck and lick broad stripes over the smooth head, over and over because it felt so good and when Lex began to whine in frustration, he swallowed, forced his dick down as deep as he could—Lex came, sharp quick thrusts into his throat, sharp cries that Bruce knew would carry on the morning air, by the time they’d both stopped shivering and groaning, gray light lit the fields and was chased by hazy salmon peeking at the horizon.
Lex grabbed a handful of his hair, and used it to pull him away from his dick. He looked down into his face. “Fuck…” Bruce moaned, touching his swollen mouth gently.
“Yeah,” Lex said and kissed him, a soft lick of his tongue against the heat and tenderness of his lips. Bruce smiled. And winced a bit. His lips felt hot and swollen and when he licked them and looked at Lex, it made his dick twitch. It was a little painful, and it was entirely good.
yeslord, continue.
Tags:
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
3/2/06 03:44 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 04:13 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 03:46 am (UTC)Some good talk, some good...
Uh....
Yeah.
*snogs you madly*
(no subject)
3/2/06 04:13 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 04:55 am (UTC)I can't remember if you commented or not on part five, which is up.
And!
New Supernatural ficlet at my lj, too.
:)
*smooch*
(no subject)
3/2/06 05:08 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 04:23 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 04:24 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 04:36 am (UTC)It would be sad if he let his fears keep him from Clark
Oh, I think Clark has some ideas about that.
(no subject)
3/2/06 04:39 am (UTC)You're killing me with the angst,but I am loving every minute of it. :D
(no subject)
3/2/06 05:30 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 04:57 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 05:31 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 05:37 am (UTC)Dominant!Lex? *dies*
I can't believe he's going to lie to Clark!! Grrr!
I feel so bad for little Clark I'm ready to ride off to his rescue, here.
*happy sigh*
A lovely section, hon. Whatever troubles you've had with it, I don't feel them. :)
Also? Big Bang = Yay!
(no subject)
3/2/06 05:50 am (UTC)I'm so relieved that this bit came off okay. It was fight to the death. Well, I exaggerate--but not by much.
(no subject)
3/2/06 04:20 pm (UTC)(no subject)
3/3/06 09:01 pm (UTC)Um...hey! Bruce couldn't help it! Who can resist the Lex? no one I tell you!
(no subject)
3/2/06 09:51 pm (UTC)only, stabbing them would be no good, coz I will leave that to clark, he will clearly knows better, how to get his men *g*
(no subject)
3/3/06 09:02 pm (UTC)(no subject)
3/3/06 09:10 pm (UTC)First, Ash made my cry, coz they broke up, and then you!!!
and, uhmm, I miss Lucas...*runs and hides*
(no subject)
3/3/06 09:41 pm (UTC)(no subject)
3/2/06 11:33 pm (UTC)(no subject)
3/3/06 09:03 pm (UTC)*points up* Hot icon, just--hot.
(no subject)
3/8/06 01:50 pm (UTC)I'm going to need a new mantra here, 'cause I firmly believe that Lex belongs with Clark... But, Brrrrex... is winning me over. (Not a difficult victory even.)
Great as usual.
(no subject)
8/29/06 02:25 am (UTC)Yay that he and Bruce are more on an equal footing, but I am leery of Clark - oh, will he be outraged? Or will he have listened and .heard. what was said?
Clark just has to grow up FASTER. It could be a superpower! It could!
(Like mine is making Matzoh Ball soup. And people have to eat it. They just do.) :)