Rip Redux part 5
7/11/06 02:23 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
roxyMy Two Dads Serioulsy Need An Intervention
(a working title)
A post-mpreg fiction
Fandom: SV
Pairing: hmm….
Rating:2
this is what happened before
So…how about, “I Picked A Fine Time To Give Up Amphetamines”?
Ripley’s third birthday was spent in Smallville. She spent the morning with Martha Jonathan and Clark, and the afternoon with Clark and Jordan, and the night with Lex.
Clark spent the night with a pounding headache, and the phone propped next to his ear, making Lois’ night long, and miserable, and long.
Ripley’s fourth birthday was spent at the farm, and this time Grandpa Jonathan called Lex and told him in no uncertain terms he was to spend the day with them. If he had to buy some fancy ass Scotch, he’d do so. Martha got on the phone and asked him please to come, there would be macaroni and cheese and apple pie…Clark got on the phone and said yes, he wanted him to come please, it would be nice. And not to worry about bringing a guest because he would have one too. Lex assured them that he would love to be there, and he looked forward to coming though he doubted he would bring a guest. He hung up the phone and smashed it into a million pieces, cleared his desk top with a snarl and as the pieces flew put his laptop through the tempered glass of the desk.
It wasn’t as satisfying as he’d hoped it would be.
******
It snowed the night before Ripley’s birthday, and the farm looked postcard beautiful. Snow frosted the trees; little gusts of wind blew sparkling flurries from the treetops and smoke from the chimney drifted away into the sapphire blue sky. There was a smell of wood smoke and cinnamon in the air, and real snow dusted the huge fir wreath on the front door.
Clark stopped in the newly cleared drive, heaved the wet shovel over his shoulder and considered the view. It was perfect, in fact, almost too perfect, Clark thought. He shook flakes from his hair and walked into the kitchen, stamped his feet on the mat.
His mom looked up from the kitchen table, Dad and Rip were sitting there too, sorting out the little metal game pieces for Monopoly. Clark smiled, he remembered that board, it had been his dad’s. He’d loved the little Scotty dog when he was a kid. Ripley looked up, “Daddy, you can play too—you can be any of these,” she pointed at the little pile, “But not the puppy. I’m the puppy. And Grandma made hot chocolate, if you get some can you get me some too?” She turned her attention back to the game, Dad dismissed until he was useful again.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, and poured cocoa for both of them, stole a snickerdoodle from the plate cooling by the stove and sat. Clark chose the shoe, and they began to play. He glanced around. Geez—it was ridiculous how much like a Christmas card they looked….
After about an hour, Ripley suddenly grinned and jumped up. “Poppa!” she crowed and ran out to the porch. Clark followed her out, and stopped on the porch, not wanting to intrude.
Lex was standing by the open car door, holding Ripley, and rubbing his cheek against her’s. “Yes, I love you,” he was saying, “And yes, I miss you all the time, too. Look in the backseat—Uncle Jordan sent a present for you. He’ promises to visit next time you’re home with me.”
Ripley let out an excited yell as she pulled a huge bag from Metropolis’ most famous toy store from the back seat. “Look Daddy, look what Unca Jordan sent me!”
She was holding a bright red truck, nearly as big as she was.
Lex grinned at Clark and said, “Do you think your dad will let her keep it?”
Clark tried not to laugh, tried to scowl. “That’s not funny, Lex.”
“Except, it is,” he gave Clark a small half grin and walked past him into the house, trailed by a happily jabbering Ripley.
Lex appeared comfortable and friendly, joking with Jonathan, and smiling easily as he talked to Martha. He made small talk with Clark, nothing important, or particularly interesting. He made no significant eye contact, but he didn’t avoid it either. Good, Clark thought. He’d worried it might be a little awkward but obviously Lex didn’t feel uncomfortable at all.
Not that he should.
After lunch, they all piled outside and made snowmen in the yard together, and Ripley taught him how to make snow angels just like Grandpa had taught her. Lex smiled with pride when she gravely inspected his angel and reluctantly passed it. “Poppa, you should have pushed harder on the wings, you don’t hardly have wings.”
“Well,” he said and glanced over at Clark, “I guess I’m not much of an angel, am I?”
Clark held onto his smile through sheer force of will.
Lex and Ripley watched Clark as he super speeded through the construction of a snowman family, momma and daddy and baby, and doggie. Ripley insisted it was an aardvark, and Lex wondered aloud if it might be a squid. Clark huffed and demanded to know how they could *not* see it was a dachshund.
Laughing, Lex swung Rip up and whirled her until she giggled helplessly and when he slipped past Clark to go into the house with her, he leaned over and quickly pressed a dry peck to his cheek. “Alexandra and I are going in to make plans for next weekend—I’d like to talk to you after,” he said.
******
After turned out to be the next morning—Ripley begged her Poppa to spend the night and help them feed the cows in the morning. Jonathan chimed in, and Lex finally agreed, but told them he would spend the night at the castle.
Clark, meanwhile, spent the rest of the night wondering what Lex meant, what he wanted to talk about. They’d gotten to be comfortable with the relationship as it was, or rather, the lack of relationship. Lex never asked him awkward questions anymore, no longer had Clark tailed on his dates—he was sure of it, he still checked every time he went out. Lex didn’t date, but Clark knew how picky and…well…*paranoid* Lex was.
Not that he *checked* to see if Lex dated. If he listened in on the penthouse the evenings he worked late in the city, or happened to sort of zip by when Lex was at some charity function or other, it was just to see that he was okay, that was all. They might not be together but he cared—Lex was after all the co-parent of his daughter. Whatever else he was, was Lex’s business.
He found out in the morning what Lex wanted when he presented a reasoned plan explaining why Alexandra and he should be in the city, in fact, in the penthouse.
“Lexie as we know, is a brilliant child, with enormous potential that, let’s be frank—will never be met in Smallville. The educational opportunities she’ll have in Metropolis absolutely demand that she live in the city.” He went on to say even though Clark could bring her into the city every day, was it fair to her? Not only that, her room at the penthouse was huge, and decorated to suit a little girl’s fantasies—well, more precisely, to suit Lexie’s fantasies and he blamed Clark entirely for her unseemly love of Godzilla, for the Godzilla sheets he was forced to buy, and the stuffed monster slavering through felt teeth on her bed, instead of the perfectly lovely unicorn shoved in a corner underneath it… “Besides,” he went on, “everyone knows Mothra was cooler by far.”
After the unresolved argument over which monster was cooler, Lex managed to sway Clark to his viewpoint, with a little help from Jonathan. After all, Jonathan reasoned, summers could be spent in Smallville, regardless, and weekends were a given.
Clark listened to Lex, watched his eyes as he watched Ripley and decided that he was the world’s biggest jerk. He’d been cruel and a bastard, and he needed to make amends.
He drew Lex to the side and explained that he’d had a revelation. “Lex…god, I’ve been going about this all wrong these last two years! Two whole years—I’m an asshole.”
Lex looked startled by Clark’s admission, but his eyes warmed and he said, “I don't know,Clark. Asshole seems so harsh. Perhaps.” He quirked a little half smile at him, his usual signal to show he was just kidding.
Clark smiled back, “So I’m thinking—please keep the penthouse, but how about this? We should fully share custody. I’ve thought about this, and I think it’s the right thing for us to do—maybe six months with you and six with me? I’ll find a place in the city, and R--Alexandra wouldn’t even have to change schools, or travel away from the rest of her family…” he heard the silence suddenly. It was all around him, a total absence of sound. An anti-sound, very much like being swaddled in a blanket--only not as comforting. In fact, it was more like being wrapped in a rubber sheet, he thought…Lex eyes went from warm to icy, to completely distant, twin cold-burning stars far, far away.
“I…see. I see. It’s an option many…many courts have agreed to. I.” He finally looked at Clark and nodded. “All right. Six months with you, six months with me. I think…I think I haven’t noticed how much you’ve grown, Clark. You really are your own man, aren’t you?” He turned from Clark and said quietly, “Let me keep an apartment for you and Alexandra. I want you close, but I promise, I won’t interfere in your life. I just want to be sure that Lexie’s home is…as warm as the one here. Will you let me do that?”
Clark thought. “Well, I suppose…if you let me pay you rent--”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Clark, you could never afford the rent on the apartment I have in mind. Just let me do this and think of it as something I do for my daughter—if not for you.”
Clark heard the slightest crack of the whip in the last words and swallowed. “Yes, thank you, that’s—that’s great. Lex…”
You handle your business the way you choose, Clark. If you need help…feel free to ask me.”
******
It was Alexandra’s fifth birthday and she’d wanted to spend it at the farm. After consulting briefly with Clark, Lex closed up the penthouse and opened the castle for the holiday season. Lex stayed in the castle, and Lexie split her time between the castle and the farm. She loved sleeping in Clark’s old room in the yellow farmhouse.
While the relationship he had with Jonathan was better than ever, the relationship between himself and Martha was still a bit strained, just slowly beginning to thaw.
Still, the rift was the polar bear in their relationship. She was on Clark’s side—and of course she should be, Lex thought. A mother’s job was to defend her child. Besides, what could he say to make her understand? * I swear I killed the biological mother of his child strictly to protect him.*? “I killed the egg donor. Not her mother,” he growled at himself.
He’d had Lana killed. He didn’t allow himself the luxury of pretending otherwise. He’d do it again in a minute. He knew from personal experience the woman had been shallow and overly concerned with what she felt the world and the people around her owed her. Fuck—everyone had some tragedy to deal with in life. All her whining and moaning about her parents—she’d been three fucking years old when they’d died. That couldn’t compare to watching your mother spend years slowly dying. Or trying to wrest control of your life from a father who could give Caligula lessons in how to be twisted.
He’d thought it would be enough to convince the bitch to leave the country. And--he had to admit--like an idiot, he’d expected (hoped) Clark would come running to him for comfort. When that hadn’t happened, he’d been angry and bitter but God--what *did* happen was so much better—*had* been so much better.
Fuck. The little bitch--she’d reached out her perfectly manicured little paw from the grave and crushed his happiness to crumbs anyway.
But not Lexie’s happiness. Nothing would hurt her—not her, not him. Not even Clark. The very first time he held Alexandra in his hands, he swore he would never do anything to harm her. She’d have the kind of love from him his father never saw fit to give. He’d be the kind of father she deserved; she’d have the kind of life she deserved.
And that doofus Clark was going to help it stay that way.
a knock at the study door interrupted his thoughts,and he called out come in, expecting Enrique or Sarah. Instead, a dark blond head popped around the door and a brilliant smile lit up the room. “ Hey, Lex, her majesty and I came up to make cookies for her birthday party.” He laughed, “Well, Lexie did anyway. I was just hoping to eat a few.”
He chuckled and waved Jonathan in “Come and have a drink, I could use a friendly face right now.”
Jonathan nodded and came in, flopped on the couch. “Lexie’s serious about the cookies, she’s got Sarah roped into this.” He whispered conspiratorially, “They’re surprises for her guests, so act surprised.” He grinned as Lex handed him a cold open bottle of an import beer Jonathan had recently, reluctantly, admitted to liking very much. “Is this a working vacation, or do you plan to hang out with us and relax some?”
Lex sighed. “Clark’s coming in tomorrow, and I’ve made plans to not be here, you know? I’ve spent her last two birthdays smiling until I thought my lips would bleed. I’m really too tired to do it this year. Next year, I promise.”
Jonathan nodded and looked angry. “I tell that boy all the time he’s wasting his life…”
Lex felt weighed down, it was too much--Jonathan’s well-meaning support was about to tip him over into self-pity. “He’s not making a mistake, he knows everything you ever thought about me is true. I don’t know how or why you decided to trust me—but you’re wrong. I’m exactly what you always feared--a bad man. You’re a fool if you think that I can’t hurt your son. At least he knows it.”
Jonathan slammed the bottle on the table, slopping beer across the lacquered surface. Lex couldn’t help but wince even though he was pretty certain Jonathan was about to paste him one. It was a relief, almost, the other shoe finally dropping.
He surprised him. “Feeling sorry for yourself? Let me tell you what I know. I know you’re a man who devotes every minute he has to his child, to his business, to everyone around him, and acts as if ever he has a moment in which he’s happy, he has to suffer for it.”
Lex shook his head. No. He didn’t understand.
Jonathan grabbed him by his shoulder and yanked him around. “I know what you did.” He looked at Lex and cupped the back of his neck. He pulled Lex forward and stared at him until he met his eyes. Lex tried to step back, but Jonathan was surprisingly strong. He could only stare back into remarkably brilliant blue eyes.
“Lex, it’s only been sheer luck that I’m not standing in your shoes, okay? I understand son, and I would have done the same thing, believe me.”
Lex whispered. “I don’t think so. Not if you knew what I really did. How I did it.”
He shook his head. “Lana didn’t have an accident. We knew that from the start. But she was no Jordan. She didn’t love him that much, and you did what you had to do.”
Lex’s throat stopped working for a moment—he could only stare stupidly at Jonathan, as the full meaning of what he’d said slammed into his brain. “Don’t. For God’s sake, don’t forgive me. I can’t stand it.” Lex’s head dropped and Jonathan hugged him close.
“All I’m saying is that I understand. And that you need to understand that you’re not alone. Lexie loves you, I love you, Jor loves you.” He gently tugged Lex’s chin up with one finger. “Do I even need to tell you how much Clark loves you? He might be stupid and stubborn, but he wants you back. He’s dying to have you back.”
Lex laughed. “Yeah? He has a strange way of showing it. Every month, he’s with some new supermodel or other. Is sleeping with half the world some plan of his—or is he trying to beat my old record?” he scrubbed his face and moved out of Jonathan’s embrace. “Damn. Sorry. It’s been a rough week.”
“Lex, forget that shit. Take care of yourself. Lexie’ll be fine. Come to dinner, than go someplace nice. *Find* someone, for God’s sake. Have a good time. Get some.” His cheeks pinked a little but he looked at Lex, defying him to disagree. Jesus, Lex—have a life, why don’t you?”
Lex couldn’t help but smile. “All right. Fine. I will.” And earned himself a slap on the back and a brilliant grin.
“That’s my boy.”
Our story began with the promise of a happy ending. Here is where the ending begins.
getting better now!
(a working title)
A post-mpreg fiction
Fandom: SV
Pairing: hmm….
Rating:2
this is what happened before
So…how about, “I Picked A Fine Time To Give Up Amphetamines”?
Ripley’s third birthday was spent in Smallville. She spent the morning with Martha Jonathan and Clark, and the afternoon with Clark and Jordan, and the night with Lex.
Clark spent the night with a pounding headache, and the phone propped next to his ear, making Lois’ night long, and miserable, and long.
Ripley’s fourth birthday was spent at the farm, and this time Grandpa Jonathan called Lex and told him in no uncertain terms he was to spend the day with them. If he had to buy some fancy ass Scotch, he’d do so. Martha got on the phone and asked him please to come, there would be macaroni and cheese and apple pie…Clark got on the phone and said yes, he wanted him to come please, it would be nice. And not to worry about bringing a guest because he would have one too. Lex assured them that he would love to be there, and he looked forward to coming though he doubted he would bring a guest. He hung up the phone and smashed it into a million pieces, cleared his desk top with a snarl and as the pieces flew put his laptop through the tempered glass of the desk.
It wasn’t as satisfying as he’d hoped it would be.
******
It snowed the night before Ripley’s birthday, and the farm looked postcard beautiful. Snow frosted the trees; little gusts of wind blew sparkling flurries from the treetops and smoke from the chimney drifted away into the sapphire blue sky. There was a smell of wood smoke and cinnamon in the air, and real snow dusted the huge fir wreath on the front door.
Clark stopped in the newly cleared drive, heaved the wet shovel over his shoulder and considered the view. It was perfect, in fact, almost too perfect, Clark thought. He shook flakes from his hair and walked into the kitchen, stamped his feet on the mat.
His mom looked up from the kitchen table, Dad and Rip were sitting there too, sorting out the little metal game pieces for Monopoly. Clark smiled, he remembered that board, it had been his dad’s. He’d loved the little Scotty dog when he was a kid. Ripley looked up, “Daddy, you can play too—you can be any of these,” she pointed at the little pile, “But not the puppy. I’m the puppy. And Grandma made hot chocolate, if you get some can you get me some too?” She turned her attention back to the game, Dad dismissed until he was useful again.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, and poured cocoa for both of them, stole a snickerdoodle from the plate cooling by the stove and sat. Clark chose the shoe, and they began to play. He glanced around. Geez—it was ridiculous how much like a Christmas card they looked….
After about an hour, Ripley suddenly grinned and jumped up. “Poppa!” she crowed and ran out to the porch. Clark followed her out, and stopped on the porch, not wanting to intrude.
Lex was standing by the open car door, holding Ripley, and rubbing his cheek against her’s. “Yes, I love you,” he was saying, “And yes, I miss you all the time, too. Look in the backseat—Uncle Jordan sent a present for you. He’ promises to visit next time you’re home with me.”
Ripley let out an excited yell as she pulled a huge bag from Metropolis’ most famous toy store from the back seat. “Look Daddy, look what Unca Jordan sent me!”
She was holding a bright red truck, nearly as big as she was.
Lex grinned at Clark and said, “Do you think your dad will let her keep it?”
Clark tried not to laugh, tried to scowl. “That’s not funny, Lex.”
“Except, it is,” he gave Clark a small half grin and walked past him into the house, trailed by a happily jabbering Ripley.
Lex appeared comfortable and friendly, joking with Jonathan, and smiling easily as he talked to Martha. He made small talk with Clark, nothing important, or particularly interesting. He made no significant eye contact, but he didn’t avoid it either. Good, Clark thought. He’d worried it might be a little awkward but obviously Lex didn’t feel uncomfortable at all.
Not that he should.
After lunch, they all piled outside and made snowmen in the yard together, and Ripley taught him how to make snow angels just like Grandpa had taught her. Lex smiled with pride when she gravely inspected his angel and reluctantly passed it. “Poppa, you should have pushed harder on the wings, you don’t hardly have wings.”
“Well,” he said and glanced over at Clark, “I guess I’m not much of an angel, am I?”
Clark held onto his smile through sheer force of will.
Lex and Ripley watched Clark as he super speeded through the construction of a snowman family, momma and daddy and baby, and doggie. Ripley insisted it was an aardvark, and Lex wondered aloud if it might be a squid. Clark huffed and demanded to know how they could *not* see it was a dachshund.
Laughing, Lex swung Rip up and whirled her until she giggled helplessly and when he slipped past Clark to go into the house with her, he leaned over and quickly pressed a dry peck to his cheek. “Alexandra and I are going in to make plans for next weekend—I’d like to talk to you after,” he said.
******
After turned out to be the next morning—Ripley begged her Poppa to spend the night and help them feed the cows in the morning. Jonathan chimed in, and Lex finally agreed, but told them he would spend the night at the castle.
Clark, meanwhile, spent the rest of the night wondering what Lex meant, what he wanted to talk about. They’d gotten to be comfortable with the relationship as it was, or rather, the lack of relationship. Lex never asked him awkward questions anymore, no longer had Clark tailed on his dates—he was sure of it, he still checked every time he went out. Lex didn’t date, but Clark knew how picky and…well…*paranoid* Lex was.
Not that he *checked* to see if Lex dated. If he listened in on the penthouse the evenings he worked late in the city, or happened to sort of zip by when Lex was at some charity function or other, it was just to see that he was okay, that was all. They might not be together but he cared—Lex was after all the co-parent of his daughter. Whatever else he was, was Lex’s business.
He found out in the morning what Lex wanted when he presented a reasoned plan explaining why Alexandra and he should be in the city, in fact, in the penthouse.
“Lexie as we know, is a brilliant child, with enormous potential that, let’s be frank—will never be met in Smallville. The educational opportunities she’ll have in Metropolis absolutely demand that she live in the city.” He went on to say even though Clark could bring her into the city every day, was it fair to her? Not only that, her room at the penthouse was huge, and decorated to suit a little girl’s fantasies—well, more precisely, to suit Lexie’s fantasies and he blamed Clark entirely for her unseemly love of Godzilla, for the Godzilla sheets he was forced to buy, and the stuffed monster slavering through felt teeth on her bed, instead of the perfectly lovely unicorn shoved in a corner underneath it… “Besides,” he went on, “everyone knows Mothra was cooler by far.”
After the unresolved argument over which monster was cooler, Lex managed to sway Clark to his viewpoint, with a little help from Jonathan. After all, Jonathan reasoned, summers could be spent in Smallville, regardless, and weekends were a given.
Clark listened to Lex, watched his eyes as he watched Ripley and decided that he was the world’s biggest jerk. He’d been cruel and a bastard, and he needed to make amends.
He drew Lex to the side and explained that he’d had a revelation. “Lex…god, I’ve been going about this all wrong these last two years! Two whole years—I’m an asshole.”
Lex looked startled by Clark’s admission, but his eyes warmed and he said, “I don't know,Clark. Asshole seems so harsh. Perhaps.” He quirked a little half smile at him, his usual signal to show he was just kidding.
Clark smiled back, “So I’m thinking—please keep the penthouse, but how about this? We should fully share custody. I’ve thought about this, and I think it’s the right thing for us to do—maybe six months with you and six with me? I’ll find a place in the city, and R--Alexandra wouldn’t even have to change schools, or travel away from the rest of her family…” he heard the silence suddenly. It was all around him, a total absence of sound. An anti-sound, very much like being swaddled in a blanket--only not as comforting. In fact, it was more like being wrapped in a rubber sheet, he thought…Lex eyes went from warm to icy, to completely distant, twin cold-burning stars far, far away.
“I…see. I see. It’s an option many…many courts have agreed to. I.” He finally looked at Clark and nodded. “All right. Six months with you, six months with me. I think…I think I haven’t noticed how much you’ve grown, Clark. You really are your own man, aren’t you?” He turned from Clark and said quietly, “Let me keep an apartment for you and Alexandra. I want you close, but I promise, I won’t interfere in your life. I just want to be sure that Lexie’s home is…as warm as the one here. Will you let me do that?”
Clark thought. “Well, I suppose…if you let me pay you rent--”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Clark, you could never afford the rent on the apartment I have in mind. Just let me do this and think of it as something I do for my daughter—if not for you.”
Clark heard the slightest crack of the whip in the last words and swallowed. “Yes, thank you, that’s—that’s great. Lex…”
You handle your business the way you choose, Clark. If you need help…feel free to ask me.”
******
It was Alexandra’s fifth birthday and she’d wanted to spend it at the farm. After consulting briefly with Clark, Lex closed up the penthouse and opened the castle for the holiday season. Lex stayed in the castle, and Lexie split her time between the castle and the farm. She loved sleeping in Clark’s old room in the yellow farmhouse.
While the relationship he had with Jonathan was better than ever, the relationship between himself and Martha was still a bit strained, just slowly beginning to thaw.
Still, the rift was the polar bear in their relationship. She was on Clark’s side—and of course she should be, Lex thought. A mother’s job was to defend her child. Besides, what could he say to make her understand? * I swear I killed the biological mother of his child strictly to protect him.*? “I killed the egg donor. Not her mother,” he growled at himself.
He’d had Lana killed. He didn’t allow himself the luxury of pretending otherwise. He’d do it again in a minute. He knew from personal experience the woman had been shallow and overly concerned with what she felt the world and the people around her owed her. Fuck—everyone had some tragedy to deal with in life. All her whining and moaning about her parents—she’d been three fucking years old when they’d died. That couldn’t compare to watching your mother spend years slowly dying. Or trying to wrest control of your life from a father who could give Caligula lessons in how to be twisted.
He’d thought it would be enough to convince the bitch to leave the country. And--he had to admit--like an idiot, he’d expected (hoped) Clark would come running to him for comfort. When that hadn’t happened, he’d been angry and bitter but God--what *did* happen was so much better—*had* been so much better.
Fuck. The little bitch--she’d reached out her perfectly manicured little paw from the grave and crushed his happiness to crumbs anyway.
But not Lexie’s happiness. Nothing would hurt her—not her, not him. Not even Clark. The very first time he held Alexandra in his hands, he swore he would never do anything to harm her. She’d have the kind of love from him his father never saw fit to give. He’d be the kind of father she deserved; she’d have the kind of life she deserved.
And that doofus Clark was going to help it stay that way.
a knock at the study door interrupted his thoughts,and he called out come in, expecting Enrique or Sarah. Instead, a dark blond head popped around the door and a brilliant smile lit up the room. “ Hey, Lex, her majesty and I came up to make cookies for her birthday party.” He laughed, “Well, Lexie did anyway. I was just hoping to eat a few.”
He chuckled and waved Jonathan in “Come and have a drink, I could use a friendly face right now.”
Jonathan nodded and came in, flopped on the couch. “Lexie’s serious about the cookies, she’s got Sarah roped into this.” He whispered conspiratorially, “They’re surprises for her guests, so act surprised.” He grinned as Lex handed him a cold open bottle of an import beer Jonathan had recently, reluctantly, admitted to liking very much. “Is this a working vacation, or do you plan to hang out with us and relax some?”
Lex sighed. “Clark’s coming in tomorrow, and I’ve made plans to not be here, you know? I’ve spent her last two birthdays smiling until I thought my lips would bleed. I’m really too tired to do it this year. Next year, I promise.”
Jonathan nodded and looked angry. “I tell that boy all the time he’s wasting his life…”
Lex felt weighed down, it was too much--Jonathan’s well-meaning support was about to tip him over into self-pity. “He’s not making a mistake, he knows everything you ever thought about me is true. I don’t know how or why you decided to trust me—but you’re wrong. I’m exactly what you always feared--a bad man. You’re a fool if you think that I can’t hurt your son. At least he knows it.”
Jonathan slammed the bottle on the table, slopping beer across the lacquered surface. Lex couldn’t help but wince even though he was pretty certain Jonathan was about to paste him one. It was a relief, almost, the other shoe finally dropping.
He surprised him. “Feeling sorry for yourself? Let me tell you what I know. I know you’re a man who devotes every minute he has to his child, to his business, to everyone around him, and acts as if ever he has a moment in which he’s happy, he has to suffer for it.”
Lex shook his head. No. He didn’t understand.
Jonathan grabbed him by his shoulder and yanked him around. “I know what you did.” He looked at Lex and cupped the back of his neck. He pulled Lex forward and stared at him until he met his eyes. Lex tried to step back, but Jonathan was surprisingly strong. He could only stare back into remarkably brilliant blue eyes.
“Lex, it’s only been sheer luck that I’m not standing in your shoes, okay? I understand son, and I would have done the same thing, believe me.”
Lex whispered. “I don’t think so. Not if you knew what I really did. How I did it.”
He shook his head. “Lana didn’t have an accident. We knew that from the start. But she was no Jordan. She didn’t love him that much, and you did what you had to do.”
Lex’s throat stopped working for a moment—he could only stare stupidly at Jonathan, as the full meaning of what he’d said slammed into his brain. “Don’t. For God’s sake, don’t forgive me. I can’t stand it.” Lex’s head dropped and Jonathan hugged him close.
“All I’m saying is that I understand. And that you need to understand that you’re not alone. Lexie loves you, I love you, Jor loves you.” He gently tugged Lex’s chin up with one finger. “Do I even need to tell you how much Clark loves you? He might be stupid and stubborn, but he wants you back. He’s dying to have you back.”
Lex laughed. “Yeah? He has a strange way of showing it. Every month, he’s with some new supermodel or other. Is sleeping with half the world some plan of his—or is he trying to beat my old record?” he scrubbed his face and moved out of Jonathan’s embrace. “Damn. Sorry. It’s been a rough week.”
“Lex, forget that shit. Take care of yourself. Lexie’ll be fine. Come to dinner, than go someplace nice. *Find* someone, for God’s sake. Have a good time. Get some.” His cheeks pinked a little but he looked at Lex, defying him to disagree. Jesus, Lex—have a life, why don’t you?”
Lex couldn’t help but smile. “All right. Fine. I will.” And earned himself a slap on the back and a brilliant grin.
“That’s my boy.”
Our story began with the promise of a happy ending. Here is where the ending begins.
getting better now!
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7/11/06 06:09 pm (UTC)That made me laugh. For some reason, I've gotten the image of Lex's head wobbling all over the place stuck in my head. Bobblehead Lex. *giggles*
See, Roxy. Mpreg does cause insanity.