SV fic post: Transference part nine
8/21/07 03:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
roxyTitle: Transference
Fandom: SV
Pairing: please…
Rating: PG
Remember this story? I hope someone's still interested! *g*
All previous parts are here, packaged for your convenience
The world was frothing and boiling at the base of the towers. Screams made their way to the top floor. The heavens bled, red and black, clouds wept blood. Lightning streaked between the towers, thunder drowned the shrieks of the crowd below. It was the end of the world.
The towers waved and creaked in the wind, and brick ran like mud, glass poured, smoking and liquid as water, into the void below them.
Thousands died. It was the end of the world, and all the heroes were dead and buried.
Clark hung on the edge of the tower, neon lights behind him reminded the world, what was left of it, that once, the Luthors nearly owned everything. Now there was nothing but Clark and Lex and the dying. Clark and Lex, closer than brothers, more than companions, yin and yang, the world in balance. Everything was as it should be.
"We're going to die here," Lex said, his hands wrapped around Clark, soothing, touching, Clark mouthed the line of his neck, and whispered words in a language Lex could make no sense of…Clark's eyes flashed red, and his teeth gleamed in the uncertain light.
"We can't die—I can't die, and I won't *let* you die."
Lex reached up and touched his face. "The sun is set, Clark. Everyone is going to die, and without the sun, so will you. You can't save me."
"So we die together," Clark shrugged, and the gleam of red stone around his neck reflected bloody against Lex's moon white cheek.
Lex nodded. "As it should be."
Clark woke with a gasp. Once again, he'd dreamed a weird twist on what had happened in real life. This time it felt like two different events had been crushed together in his mind, and all the people surrounding the event disappeared. All the pain, the suffering, had been his fault. He'd done something to Lex, and whatever he'd done made Lex unable to stop the end of the world from coming.
*****
Clark made up his mind.
Lex was gone. He knew it. He watched Liam, followed him, examined every bit of his life, and the inescapable conclusion was, Lex was dead. Liam Miles was all there was. A nice, somewhat obsessive guy, driven by the same demons that drove ordinary men. Liam Miles was a guy in a relationship that was lousy as hell, pretty much the same as a lot of people found themselves in, whether due to inertia or stupidity…Miles was just what he claimed to be, a high school science teacher, a man trying his best to make his way through life with a minimum of trauma and as much happiness as he could grab, and nothing more on his mind than that. The name Luthor was just a name.
Lucas had nothing to fear, and Clark had nothing to gain here, no one to protect, except maybe Liam…that was what he saw, and that was what he was telling Lucas, and maybe he could close this book and repair the damage in his own life.
"Lucas. I've wasted a lot of time trailing this Liam Miles, and it's pointless. The man is just who he says he is, and nothing more. He's just some guy, okay?"
"Well, thank you, Clark, that's just what I needed from you. You have a sense of people—an ability to see right into their souls, so to speak. If you feel Miles is no trouble, than I believe you. Listen, if you like, stay on a bit. It's paid. Hey, I know I threw your life into upheaval and I'm sorry, really sorry. If it helps at all, you won’t see me again. Unless you want to."
Clark caught the self mocking note in Lucas' voice--so much like Lex's, the way his off hand comment held a tiny note of hope, overlaid with hopelessness. Lucas could be so much like Lex. That's why Clark knew he'd have to make sure Lucas kept away from Liam. "Lucas--" he began, and sighed quietly. "Good-bye, Lucas."
"All right. Good-bye, Clark. It was nice working with you."
******
Liam walked into his dark apartment, dropped his keys into a tray by the front door, set his briefcase down and walked into the small living room. He crossed in front of the room's single window, reached up to undo his tie, and froze.
"Lee-eex. What a pleasure," a soft voice purred in the darkness.
Liam considered lying, running, going for his desk…
Lucas clicked on the table lamp next to the chair he sprawled in. He pointed a gun carelessly at Lex, and smirked. "Too late—I checked the apartment first. Really Lex, taped to the bottom of the desk? Corny, big brother."
"Don’t call me that."
"Why not? Don't we share blood? What have I done to you? Nothing. Why be so uncharitable, Lex?" Lucas rose and slipped the gun into his pocket. Liam grimaced, bit at his lip.
"What do you want from me?"
"Aw, no more pretending? We aren’t going to fence around a little more? Come on, convince me you're not Lex."
Lex growled and threw his tie to the floor. "I repeat, what do you want?"
"I want to know the how and the why and did you kill Dad, and what do you want…" Lucas let his gaze slide slowly over Lex from head to toe. "What do you have planned for me?"
"Nothing, you idiot. If I was going to do something, I wouldn’t have waited this long." Lex leaned against the countertop separating his kitchen from his living space, and Lucas could see the change wash over Liam, watched him slowly become some one else—become Lex. He stood taller, his body language was looser, but his face was tighter. He pushed the red hair away from his face, and Lucas came closer and peered into Lex's face.
"Maybe, maybe…you look good with hair, Lex .Did you look like that before?"
"It was curly and bright red. Are you going to kill me?"
"Depends. Do you want *me* dead? Are you waiting to kill me—how good a cocksucker are you?"
Lex recoiled from Lucas, the look of shock on his face drained away into amused contempt and he lifted his lip. "You've got to be kidding me. You came all this way to—to coerce me into some disgusting fantasy of yours--"
"Hey. Not so disgusting. Actually, I came here with a proposition for you. Tell me what you did, how this happened, and I'll take care of Clark. Kill him, out him, protect him—whatever you want."
"Fuck," Lex sighed and rubbed his face. "I should have known you knew about him. Shit. Was that my fault—never mind, it doesn’t matter. I don’t want you to hurt him, ever. That's the only thing that would make me come after you. Clark belongs—belonged to Lex. Leave him be. Lex doesn't want him dead anymore—never did."
"That's cute, the way you've separated yourself into two identities like that. Belle Reeve-ish, but cute. So you—or should I say Lex-- didn't hate him and all that shit was just a way to get his attention , keep it focused on the crazy shit while--what—you did underhanded things quietly and quickly, heading for the White House?"
"That was Dad's goal for me. I wanted to be great, yes, I wanted to influence the world—protect it—but in my own way. Under no restriction or constraints. In my mind, I was better than that—destined to be greater than that. Laws for normal people didn’t apply to me. And eventually, I knew Clark would come around; he'd see that throwing his lot in with me was his destiny. He'd see he needed me to keep him human." Lex remembered how right he was, of knowing *absolutely* how right he was, and tried to still the sick feeling roiling in his stomach. "And of course, of course…the time would come, he'd come to my bed, on his own—because he wanted to. Or he had to—one way or another…" Lex swallowed thick sour saliva, wiped the back of his hand over his mouth and Lucas watched the movement, unconsciously mimicked the move, licking his lip…"I was insane for a long time, I think."
"Big brother, you're right. You were crazy on a Luthor scale. Okay, so the point in all that reminiscing is the reason. Now tell me how."
Lex stared at him, thinking, weighing…
He came around the back of the couch separating kitchen from living area. Lucas came to join him, sliding down at the opposite end of the couch. "Tell me."
Lex took a breath, and told Lucas what happened.
"Dad tried to kill me—a couple of times that I have proof of, a few times I suspect. To this day, I do believe that he loved me like he claimed." Lucas nodded, and Lex went on. "He tried to kill me, and somehow in his mind was able to justify it. But we're Luthors and we can love someone with all our heart—and still try to destroy them. Clark, case in point. Being pushed out of his life like that…I struck back with everything I had, and when that didn't work, I struck out at his alter ego. I hated that he didn't need me," he said, almost as an aside. Lucas nudged his foot with his and Lex refocused. "I didn’t kill Dad. I didn’t bother to look for who did. In fact, I thought at first it might have been you." Lucas grinned and shook his head. "I know," Lex continued. "Too much work for you. I even thought at first that it might be Clark, finally giving in to the temptation, you know? But I don’t really think he could have—if he could kill, he'd have done it before, many times over, in Smallville, in Metropolis. I gave him enough reason…anyway, the man was dead and I didn’t care how, or who. And after I started checking into all of Dad's operations, I felt even less inclined to search for revenge."
He got up, and went into the tiny kitchen and fixed a drink; the way he stood in front of the sink, the way he fixed the drink was like a memory from the past come alive. It made Lucas think of Smallville, the castle, and fighting over Lex…he smirked. Lex walked back, and Liam's precise, rather stiff walk, was gone. Lex glided smoothly over the floor towards him like a razor on glass. Lucas was swallowing before he even got his tumbler of scotch…the sip made him grimace. "Johnny Walker…"
Lex shrugged. "I can afford it." He walked around the small room and narrated a terrible tale in a blank soft voice. "There was a point once in my relationship with Clark--" Lucas took note of the word Lex used "—a specific time, I thought he was going to kill me…well more than one time," he laughed humorlessly, "but in this instance, I was afraid he was going to…to rape me. Surprise, surprise," he laughed softly, "It wasn't Clark. He wore Clark's face, his body but…"
"Dad…"
"Yes," Lex said, eyebrows tilted up in surprise at Lucas' instant acceptance.
"If it was going to hurt you, it had to be Dad. Go on."
"Dad had managed to switch consciousness—souls—with Clark—
"Souls!" Lucas laughed. "You found religion too, Lex?"
Lex smiled at Lucas. "I've always believed in God. I've always believed in the existence of souls, and free will…heaven and hell. I know the Devil is more than an abstract concept. I know evil pollutes, destroys you like a cancer. I believe in redemption, and forgiveness."
"Really? You think you've achieved that, Lex? You think that what you did has been forgiven? Or maybe you think it's excused because you couldn't help yourself? That cancerous evil, taking you over against your will…"
"I know I had a damn choice, was offered a different path—shit--so many times and I still took the route I shouldn't. And now you have it all, above board and legal and how the hell did that happen?" Lex grinned a crooked grin and Lucas snickered.
"Lazy. Too much work to be an evil captain of industry like Dad and yourself. I was content being a grifter. Gotta say, though, being straight is easier, dai goh." He spread out across the couch, dropped his hands between his spread knees. "The only difference between you and me is want. The size of our wanting. You wanted to be great, and I…want a good fuck, a hamburger done just right. I want to be comfortable, not sleep in an alley and know when I wake up in the morning, whatever I went to sleep with is still there. You, you poor mother fucker, were raised to be a conquering ruler of men, I was raised by—well, I pretty much raised myself. You had something to prove, and I just wanted to have fun. And eat."
"You sell yourself short all the time, Lucas. You're so fucking smart, you could be much more than what you are…but…" He shrugged and Lucas watched with fascination. Lex's every movement was so liquid, so mesmerizing. He had to force himself to refocus.
"Dad tried to kill me. Twice that I'm sure of, a few other times I suspect. But…when he was killed, I found out that he had another attempt planned, very direct and inelegant, one I had no chance of surviving. His plan was to kill me and take my place. Oh, not as Alexander, bald and moon-pale and freakish…no, he had a *perfected* copy of Lex; tinkered with to be sure it had none of my-- Lex's--deficiencies. He was going to trade consciousness with the clone. Kill me, the clone in his body, and then, Liam Miles was going to appear, inherit all. He planned to keep on running LuthorCorp for another forty or fifty years, standing on the corpses of you, and me, and some poor unnamed bastard."
Lucas shook his head. "Your kid. Your son."
"No! That thing was never a child; it had nothing to do with me--"
"Oh, why, because you didn't want it to be? Manufactured human or not—what you did was murder. He was part of you, and you killed him, just like Dad. You're rebuilding *your* life on the corpse of a poor mother fucker who never even had a *chance* at life, thanks to you two. Tell me something, did he call you Daddy before you killed him?"
"You little fuck…" Lex remembered lively intelligent eyes staring up at him from a smooth, wet face, coated with the fluids from the growth tank, an unscarred cupid's bow of a mouth beginning to open, right before he grabbed it's—his—hand, pressed the stone between them and ripped consciousness from his body. Lex recalled with hallucinogenic clarity the shot he put in his own chest, a red rose of blood blooming. It had been nightmarish to watch his own face twist in pain, the scar on his lip leach dead white against a whiter face. He heard again the confused bleat of pain, a pale thin hand reaching out for help--and then it was over and he blew up the body, the lab and left everything to Lucas and he ran.
"Murder and lies. My legacy." he murmured. "Until I die, I'll never have peace."
"They say anyone can be forgiven anything if they strive for it—if they believe. Me, I'm not so sure, but than again, I don’t believe in anything but what I can hold in my hand, see with my eyes. Do your best, Liam, and maybe one day, you'll be a good man."
Lex watched him leave. Slowly, he let Lex fade away again; it felt good to do so. He gathered up his and Lucas' glasses. He filled the sink with boiling water and detergent and dropped the glasses in.
He wondered if Clark knew about Liam. He wondered if Lucas was really going to leave him alone.
He showered before bed, examining himself thoroughly in the mirror before climbing in under the hot, stinging spray. He touched hair on his body in a way that was becoming ritualistic, performed nightly over the last three years he'd been someone else….
Head. Chest. Groin. Armpits…he watched the movements of his hands and he wasn't seeing Liam in the mirror, he was reliving a memory, going to church with his mother--it was expected of wives in their social circle then.
He remembered her dressed in black and gray, her hair twisted back into a knot, dark red and sleek, like polished stone…her face was pale and thin, too delicate for the severe hairstyle. It made her appear even more ethereal…remembered her long elegant hands, incased in dove gray leather, making the sign of the cross…he caught a whiff of incense before closing his eyes and wishing the memory deep and far away.
What did Lex's mother pray for? Redemption? Rescue? Peace?
Liam leaned against the tiled wall and let hot water wash over him and wished for it all memory to be gone. Prayed for it all to fade away.
tbc
Fandom: SV
Pairing: please…
Rating: PG
Remember this story? I hope someone's still interested! *g*
All previous parts are here, packaged for your convenience
The world was frothing and boiling at the base of the towers. Screams made their way to the top floor. The heavens bled, red and black, clouds wept blood. Lightning streaked between the towers, thunder drowned the shrieks of the crowd below. It was the end of the world.
The towers waved and creaked in the wind, and brick ran like mud, glass poured, smoking and liquid as water, into the void below them.
Thousands died. It was the end of the world, and all the heroes were dead and buried.
Clark hung on the edge of the tower, neon lights behind him reminded the world, what was left of it, that once, the Luthors nearly owned everything. Now there was nothing but Clark and Lex and the dying. Clark and Lex, closer than brothers, more than companions, yin and yang, the world in balance. Everything was as it should be.
"We're going to die here," Lex said, his hands wrapped around Clark, soothing, touching, Clark mouthed the line of his neck, and whispered words in a language Lex could make no sense of…Clark's eyes flashed red, and his teeth gleamed in the uncertain light.
"We can't die—I can't die, and I won't *let* you die."
Lex reached up and touched his face. "The sun is set, Clark. Everyone is going to die, and without the sun, so will you. You can't save me."
"So we die together," Clark shrugged, and the gleam of red stone around his neck reflected bloody against Lex's moon white cheek.
Lex nodded. "As it should be."
Clark woke with a gasp. Once again, he'd dreamed a weird twist on what had happened in real life. This time it felt like two different events had been crushed together in his mind, and all the people surrounding the event disappeared. All the pain, the suffering, had been his fault. He'd done something to Lex, and whatever he'd done made Lex unable to stop the end of the world from coming.
*****
Clark made up his mind.
Lex was gone. He knew it. He watched Liam, followed him, examined every bit of his life, and the inescapable conclusion was, Lex was dead. Liam Miles was all there was. A nice, somewhat obsessive guy, driven by the same demons that drove ordinary men. Liam Miles was a guy in a relationship that was lousy as hell, pretty much the same as a lot of people found themselves in, whether due to inertia or stupidity…Miles was just what he claimed to be, a high school science teacher, a man trying his best to make his way through life with a minimum of trauma and as much happiness as he could grab, and nothing more on his mind than that. The name Luthor was just a name.
Lucas had nothing to fear, and Clark had nothing to gain here, no one to protect, except maybe Liam…that was what he saw, and that was what he was telling Lucas, and maybe he could close this book and repair the damage in his own life.
"Lucas. I've wasted a lot of time trailing this Liam Miles, and it's pointless. The man is just who he says he is, and nothing more. He's just some guy, okay?"
"Well, thank you, Clark, that's just what I needed from you. You have a sense of people—an ability to see right into their souls, so to speak. If you feel Miles is no trouble, than I believe you. Listen, if you like, stay on a bit. It's paid. Hey, I know I threw your life into upheaval and I'm sorry, really sorry. If it helps at all, you won’t see me again. Unless you want to."
Clark caught the self mocking note in Lucas' voice--so much like Lex's, the way his off hand comment held a tiny note of hope, overlaid with hopelessness. Lucas could be so much like Lex. That's why Clark knew he'd have to make sure Lucas kept away from Liam. "Lucas--" he began, and sighed quietly. "Good-bye, Lucas."
"All right. Good-bye, Clark. It was nice working with you."
******
Liam walked into his dark apartment, dropped his keys into a tray by the front door, set his briefcase down and walked into the small living room. He crossed in front of the room's single window, reached up to undo his tie, and froze.
"Lee-eex. What a pleasure," a soft voice purred in the darkness.
Liam considered lying, running, going for his desk…
Lucas clicked on the table lamp next to the chair he sprawled in. He pointed a gun carelessly at Lex, and smirked. "Too late—I checked the apartment first. Really Lex, taped to the bottom of the desk? Corny, big brother."
"Don’t call me that."
"Why not? Don't we share blood? What have I done to you? Nothing. Why be so uncharitable, Lex?" Lucas rose and slipped the gun into his pocket. Liam grimaced, bit at his lip.
"What do you want from me?"
"Aw, no more pretending? We aren’t going to fence around a little more? Come on, convince me you're not Lex."
Lex growled and threw his tie to the floor. "I repeat, what do you want?"
"I want to know the how and the why and did you kill Dad, and what do you want…" Lucas let his gaze slide slowly over Lex from head to toe. "What do you have planned for me?"
"Nothing, you idiot. If I was going to do something, I wouldn’t have waited this long." Lex leaned against the countertop separating his kitchen from his living space, and Lucas could see the change wash over Liam, watched him slowly become some one else—become Lex. He stood taller, his body language was looser, but his face was tighter. He pushed the red hair away from his face, and Lucas came closer and peered into Lex's face.
"Maybe, maybe…you look good with hair, Lex .Did you look like that before?"
"It was curly and bright red. Are you going to kill me?"
"Depends. Do you want *me* dead? Are you waiting to kill me—how good a cocksucker are you?"
Lex recoiled from Lucas, the look of shock on his face drained away into amused contempt and he lifted his lip. "You've got to be kidding me. You came all this way to—to coerce me into some disgusting fantasy of yours--"
"Hey. Not so disgusting. Actually, I came here with a proposition for you. Tell me what you did, how this happened, and I'll take care of Clark. Kill him, out him, protect him—whatever you want."
"Fuck," Lex sighed and rubbed his face. "I should have known you knew about him. Shit. Was that my fault—never mind, it doesn’t matter. I don’t want you to hurt him, ever. That's the only thing that would make me come after you. Clark belongs—belonged to Lex. Leave him be. Lex doesn't want him dead anymore—never did."
"That's cute, the way you've separated yourself into two identities like that. Belle Reeve-ish, but cute. So you—or should I say Lex-- didn't hate him and all that shit was just a way to get his attention , keep it focused on the crazy shit while--what—you did underhanded things quietly and quickly, heading for the White House?"
"That was Dad's goal for me. I wanted to be great, yes, I wanted to influence the world—protect it—but in my own way. Under no restriction or constraints. In my mind, I was better than that—destined to be greater than that. Laws for normal people didn’t apply to me. And eventually, I knew Clark would come around; he'd see that throwing his lot in with me was his destiny. He'd see he needed me to keep him human." Lex remembered how right he was, of knowing *absolutely* how right he was, and tried to still the sick feeling roiling in his stomach. "And of course, of course…the time would come, he'd come to my bed, on his own—because he wanted to. Or he had to—one way or another…" Lex swallowed thick sour saliva, wiped the back of his hand over his mouth and Lucas watched the movement, unconsciously mimicked the move, licking his lip…"I was insane for a long time, I think."
"Big brother, you're right. You were crazy on a Luthor scale. Okay, so the point in all that reminiscing is the reason. Now tell me how."
Lex stared at him, thinking, weighing…
He came around the back of the couch separating kitchen from living area. Lucas came to join him, sliding down at the opposite end of the couch. "Tell me."
Lex took a breath, and told Lucas what happened.
"Dad tried to kill me—a couple of times that I have proof of, a few times I suspect. To this day, I do believe that he loved me like he claimed." Lucas nodded, and Lex went on. "He tried to kill me, and somehow in his mind was able to justify it. But we're Luthors and we can love someone with all our heart—and still try to destroy them. Clark, case in point. Being pushed out of his life like that…I struck back with everything I had, and when that didn't work, I struck out at his alter ego. I hated that he didn't need me," he said, almost as an aside. Lucas nudged his foot with his and Lex refocused. "I didn’t kill Dad. I didn’t bother to look for who did. In fact, I thought at first it might have been you." Lucas grinned and shook his head. "I know," Lex continued. "Too much work for you. I even thought at first that it might be Clark, finally giving in to the temptation, you know? But I don’t really think he could have—if he could kill, he'd have done it before, many times over, in Smallville, in Metropolis. I gave him enough reason…anyway, the man was dead and I didn’t care how, or who. And after I started checking into all of Dad's operations, I felt even less inclined to search for revenge."
He got up, and went into the tiny kitchen and fixed a drink; the way he stood in front of the sink, the way he fixed the drink was like a memory from the past come alive. It made Lucas think of Smallville, the castle, and fighting over Lex…he smirked. Lex walked back, and Liam's precise, rather stiff walk, was gone. Lex glided smoothly over the floor towards him like a razor on glass. Lucas was swallowing before he even got his tumbler of scotch…the sip made him grimace. "Johnny Walker…"
Lex shrugged. "I can afford it." He walked around the small room and narrated a terrible tale in a blank soft voice. "There was a point once in my relationship with Clark--" Lucas took note of the word Lex used "—a specific time, I thought he was going to kill me…well more than one time," he laughed humorlessly, "but in this instance, I was afraid he was going to…to rape me. Surprise, surprise," he laughed softly, "It wasn't Clark. He wore Clark's face, his body but…"
"Dad…"
"Yes," Lex said, eyebrows tilted up in surprise at Lucas' instant acceptance.
"If it was going to hurt you, it had to be Dad. Go on."
"Dad had managed to switch consciousness—souls—with Clark—
"Souls!" Lucas laughed. "You found religion too, Lex?"
Lex smiled at Lucas. "I've always believed in God. I've always believed in the existence of souls, and free will…heaven and hell. I know the Devil is more than an abstract concept. I know evil pollutes, destroys you like a cancer. I believe in redemption, and forgiveness."
"Really? You think you've achieved that, Lex? You think that what you did has been forgiven? Or maybe you think it's excused because you couldn't help yourself? That cancerous evil, taking you over against your will…"
"I know I had a damn choice, was offered a different path—shit--so many times and I still took the route I shouldn't. And now you have it all, above board and legal and how the hell did that happen?" Lex grinned a crooked grin and Lucas snickered.
"Lazy. Too much work to be an evil captain of industry like Dad and yourself. I was content being a grifter. Gotta say, though, being straight is easier, dai goh." He spread out across the couch, dropped his hands between his spread knees. "The only difference between you and me is want. The size of our wanting. You wanted to be great, and I…want a good fuck, a hamburger done just right. I want to be comfortable, not sleep in an alley and know when I wake up in the morning, whatever I went to sleep with is still there. You, you poor mother fucker, were raised to be a conquering ruler of men, I was raised by—well, I pretty much raised myself. You had something to prove, and I just wanted to have fun. And eat."
"You sell yourself short all the time, Lucas. You're so fucking smart, you could be much more than what you are…but…" He shrugged and Lucas watched with fascination. Lex's every movement was so liquid, so mesmerizing. He had to force himself to refocus.
"Dad tried to kill me. Twice that I'm sure of, a few other times I suspect. But…when he was killed, I found out that he had another attempt planned, very direct and inelegant, one I had no chance of surviving. His plan was to kill me and take my place. Oh, not as Alexander, bald and moon-pale and freakish…no, he had a *perfected* copy of Lex; tinkered with to be sure it had none of my-- Lex's--deficiencies. He was going to trade consciousness with the clone. Kill me, the clone in his body, and then, Liam Miles was going to appear, inherit all. He planned to keep on running LuthorCorp for another forty or fifty years, standing on the corpses of you, and me, and some poor unnamed bastard."
Lucas shook his head. "Your kid. Your son."
"No! That thing was never a child; it had nothing to do with me--"
"Oh, why, because you didn't want it to be? Manufactured human or not—what you did was murder. He was part of you, and you killed him, just like Dad. You're rebuilding *your* life on the corpse of a poor mother fucker who never even had a *chance* at life, thanks to you two. Tell me something, did he call you Daddy before you killed him?"
"You little fuck…" Lex remembered lively intelligent eyes staring up at him from a smooth, wet face, coated with the fluids from the growth tank, an unscarred cupid's bow of a mouth beginning to open, right before he grabbed it's—his—hand, pressed the stone between them and ripped consciousness from his body. Lex recalled with hallucinogenic clarity the shot he put in his own chest, a red rose of blood blooming. It had been nightmarish to watch his own face twist in pain, the scar on his lip leach dead white against a whiter face. He heard again the confused bleat of pain, a pale thin hand reaching out for help--and then it was over and he blew up the body, the lab and left everything to Lucas and he ran.
"Murder and lies. My legacy." he murmured. "Until I die, I'll never have peace."
"They say anyone can be forgiven anything if they strive for it—if they believe. Me, I'm not so sure, but than again, I don’t believe in anything but what I can hold in my hand, see with my eyes. Do your best, Liam, and maybe one day, you'll be a good man."
Lex watched him leave. Slowly, he let Lex fade away again; it felt good to do so. He gathered up his and Lucas' glasses. He filled the sink with boiling water and detergent and dropped the glasses in.
He wondered if Clark knew about Liam. He wondered if Lucas was really going to leave him alone.
He showered before bed, examining himself thoroughly in the mirror before climbing in under the hot, stinging spray. He touched hair on his body in a way that was becoming ritualistic, performed nightly over the last three years he'd been someone else….
Head. Chest. Groin. Armpits…he watched the movements of his hands and he wasn't seeing Liam in the mirror, he was reliving a memory, going to church with his mother--it was expected of wives in their social circle then.
He remembered her dressed in black and gray, her hair twisted back into a knot, dark red and sleek, like polished stone…her face was pale and thin, too delicate for the severe hairstyle. It made her appear even more ethereal…remembered her long elegant hands, incased in dove gray leather, making the sign of the cross…he caught a whiff of incense before closing his eyes and wishing the memory deep and far away.
What did Lex's mother pray for? Redemption? Rescue? Peace?
Liam leaned against the tiled wall and let hot water wash over him and wished for it all memory to be gone. Prayed for it all to fade away.
tbc
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
8/21/07 08:01 pm (UTC)Cool!
(no subject)
8/21/07 08:21 pm (UTC)(no subject)
8/21/07 08:14 pm (UTC)And Clark's dream...wow.
I'm so happy now! :-D I'm so looking forward to seeing what happens next.
(no subject)
8/21/07 08:22 pm (UTC)(no subject)
8/21/07 09:41 pm (UTC)(it's a relief that it wasn't clark who raped lex.)
(no subject)
8/22/07 01:34 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/22/07 01:35 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/22/07 12:34 am (UTC)I'm glad to see you updating this story!
(no subject)
8/22/07 01:36 am (UTC)omgosh, I love your icon!!!
(no subject)
8/22/07 01:49 am (UTC)I love your Lucas icon, too. Your Lucas is growing on me, you know--though I have to say part of my increased tolerance for Lucas was that completely cheesy angel miniseries the actor who played Lucas did, which somehow retroactively made me like the character more. Weird, huh?
(no subject)
8/24/07 12:32 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/22/07 01:11 am (UTC)Lucas turned out to be an interesting character and sympathetic.
Now what do you have planned for Clark and Liam now that Clark thinks Liam isn't Lex? And what kind of reaction is Clark going to have when he learns the truth?
These and other questions to be answered next time, I hope.
(no subject)
8/22/07 01:43 am (UTC)I'm glad that you found Lucas was sympathetic. He usually causes horrible havoc, but this time out, he was being on his very best behavior. *g*
(no subject)
8/22/07 01:17 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/22/07 01:55 am (UTC)Thanks so much for sticking with me on this one, love!
(no subject)
8/22/07 03:30 am (UTC)On a semi-related note I don't know if you saw them at the time but I posted a couple of pictures of Paul Wesley at Comic-Con back in July here, if you're interested. :)
(no subject)
8/22/07 03:51 am (UTC)Thank you so much! It does my heart good that you liked that bit--I really did. :)
It's a twisted old world when Lucas seems to be the voice of morality, isn't it? He wasn't about to let Lex off th hook for what he'd done.
Thanks also for the heads up on the pics--I didn't see that first time but I'll check it out now!
(no subject)
8/22/07 04:15 am (UTC)Now... Is Lucas really going to leave Liam alone?
(no subject)
8/23/07 03:32 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/22/07 06:37 am (UTC)I am still interested!!!
(no subject)
8/23/07 03:33 am (UTC)Thank you lovey!
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8/23/07 03:35 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/23/07 03:39 am (UTC)Can it get better?
(no subject)
8/23/07 04:36 am (UTC)*dies*
(no subject)
8/22/07 08:49 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/23/07 03:36 am (UTC)no one, i repeat, no one
8/23/07 08:27 pm (UTC)//"Oh, why, because you didn't want it to be? Manufactured human or not—what you did was murder. He was part of you, and you killed him, just like Dad. You're rebuilding *your* life on the corpse of a poor mother fucker who never even had a *chance* at life, thanks to you two. Tell me something, did he call you Daddy before you killed him?"//
*curls over, and dies*
*points to you, coz of the million unfinished fannish things that will never made it to light! may my flist will revenge me upon you *g**
Re: no one, i repeat, no one
8/24/07 12:35 am (UTC)*dangles Lucas in front of you*
And wow, thank you so *very* much, what a nice thing to say!
you are more evil than zod and lionel combined!!
8/26/07 12:11 pm (UTC)ohhhh, returns from the death, to have lucas's babies!!! he is all MINE!! grrrrrrr, anyone , who is going to hurt him, will *KILLKKILLS*..
(no subject)
8/23/07 09:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
8/24/07 12:37 am (UTC)(no subject)
8/24/07 03:12 am (UTC)(no subject)
3/10/13 05:10 pm (UTC)