How Lex kills his dad.

[roxy]

See, what happens is, Lionel is all, "Clark is like the son I never had--and best of all it's okay to tap *that* ass, woo-hoo!!"

And Lex is all, "You fucker! I'm going to KICK *yours*--and godamnit, I've had dibs on his ass since he was fifteen! Pervert!" which Lionel snorts at because he knows all about the CoCK.

"Oh yeah well you snooze you loose. No one told you to marry Princess Psycho,"Lionel says, and there may be some hair-flipping there, because EVOL, "And guess what--if you tried to kick his ass you'd break your foot because his ass is made of STEEL!"

"Gasp! That toned...no, wait you mean--invulnerable? As in alien visitors from another planet?" lex looks kind of shocked and shifty at the same time. EVOL.

"IDIOT! HELLO? Kryptonian boy, words all over his barn, barfs around green shiny stones--yes, super-enhanced alien, geez. How dumb can you--erk!"

"Dad, do you know what defenestration means? Of course you do--ciao! Enrique, make that one for dinner...what do you mean he doesn't work here anymore...?"

eta: I blame it on this quote:It's so strange now, because everybody seems to know about Clark's secret. It's not a secret anymore. Chloe knows, Lana knows, and Lionel knows. Does Lex know? He's awfully stupid if he doesn't." John Glover.

Comments

[rednihilist.livejournal.com]

OH. MY. GOD!!!!! You killed me dead, too, with this. Jesus, woman! I was drinking of the cherry 7Up and I snorted. Ooooh, it still smarts. *put upon sigh* Thus is the price I pay for witnessing genius, sheer genius!! *mwhaaaaa*


I've had dibs on his ass since he was fifteen! Pervert!" which Lionel snorts at because he knows all about the CoCK.

Priceless. . . *G*

[cinderella81.livejournal.com]

*gigglesnort* OMG!! That is just awesome and cracky and so fun!!!!

[helioshyperion.livejournal.com]

I've had dibs on his ass since he was fifteen! Pervert!"

Oh my gosh, yes! Everyone knows he's had plans for that ass for years now. What brought this burst of genius insanity on?

[mkitty3.livejournal.com]

I've had dibs on his ass since he was fifteen! Pervert!"

So true! So true! But I gotta tell you, your icon has TRAUMATIZED me for life. It scares me Roxy!

[goth-clark.livejournal.com]

You mean Lex has had dibs since Clark was a little boy who touched his face...

[herohunter.livejournal.com]

YES, YES, YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tabaqui]

*snerk*
Of *course* there's hair flipping! Lionel has the spiffy hair that he can flip to amazing effect!
*snickers*

Ya, c'mon, Lex - get with the program!

[supercaptain182.livejournal.com]

*is ded*

ROTFL

[rosy5000.livejournal.com]

OMG!!!! I love you so much right now! :D *tackles hugs!!!*

Bad thing is... I can actually see that conversation happening between John and Michael. *giggles*

*smooches*

[sussixer.livejournal.com]

You're a nut, but keep it comin'! ; )

[miss-saigon.livejournal.com]

ahahahaha, that John Glover quote is AMAZING:DDDD

[mayphoenix.livejournal.com]

OMG! IZ DED!

LOVE how you totally pwned this with l337 speak. You are made of teh AWESOME. *smishes you*

But of course, LEX KNOWS. He's just pretending he doesn't. Because? EVOL!!!! :D

[ferdalump.livejournal.com]

**giggles like a little sea monkey**

That just made me laugh out loud.

Seriously, Lex is looking pretty dern stupid for a genius.

John Glover = ♥

[droolfangrrl.livejournal.com]

Hm. Somebody dove into the easter candy a bit early, eh?

[xinsidemyskinx.livejournal.com]

Your brain sometimes frightens me .... i still love you but that is not the point just for the record.

[carolandtom.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot for making me laugh so hard. You are unique!

[yavannauk.livejournal.com]

Bwahahahahaha! Love it!

[myownghost.livejournal.com]

>there may be some hair-flipping there, because EVOL...

oh yes! and the defenestration is definitely called for. *g*

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

Hehehee. I love you.

It's completely ridiculous that the genius doesn't know. Then again we aren't really shown how this version of Lex is a genius.

[voldything.livejournal.com]

BRILLIANTNESS

[jeannev.livejournal.com]

LOL, that perfect and hilarious!

[nerowill.livejournal.com]

*chokes with laughter* I *heart* John Glover!

[selinamoonfire.livejournal.com]

OMG What a way to wake up! Yes! I totally see this as the reason why Lex finally offs Lionel. And it'd be justified, too. ;)

I love how your brain works!

[jakrar.livejournal.com]

Lionel must be defenestrated. *nods* The hair-flipping MUST BE STOPPED!