what the actual fuck????

[roxy]

I'm going to include this in its entirety because I don't think I owe this person any respect. Anyone that calls their vagina a va-jay-jay is asking for a public mocking.

AO3 Comment on Ripley, Believe It Or Not...."

mikala Fri 10 Apr 2015 08:42AM EDT

I sort of like this and sort of am ambivalent about it also. Lex and Clark as sex partners is neat #but very sinful#. Clark having a baby in any way is really gross and the way you described his from conception to birthing the girl was nasty. That thing popping from his wiener #yuk# and that chest va-jay-jay #horrors#. Of course if all men got pregnant at least once, then perhaps they might see we gals and our va-jay-jays as something to truly worship as is our rights, so that is what helps make this story better. Not that any real, straight guys ever read the faggy two male slash. Only homo queer men would read a story like this with two male lovers so I guess that I lose my cred about male pregnancy and treating we ladies better. Damn. Well, I hope you enjoy writing this kind of stuff. I prefer no gay two or whatever males having illicit, illegal and amoral sinful sex type stuff. I gave this men on men and pregnancy stuff a try and will not be repeating it ever again. Give me Lois and Clark anytime for sure.

Roxy: I'm not sure how to approach this comment. It was certainly entertaining.

Doesn't it sound as though a couple of people wrote that comment? A couple of thirteen year olds? And possibly used Google translate to boot? Maybe this is like performance art. Meant to be over the top and really weird. They did get one thing right--that birthing part was naaaaasty! :D

Comments

[fireheart13.livejournal.com]

What the actual fuck indeed!!!!!!?!?!?!?!

Definitely sounded translate-y. Actually almost sounded like thirteen year old BOYS, the way they talked about "faggy two male slash". Speaking of which, they certainly missed the entire DEFINITION of slash, that being SAME SEX RELATIONSHIPS. LOL

You had the perfect response about it being entertaining ROTFL!!

I haven't read that one, I might have to now, just for the "chest va-jay-jay"!!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

LOL!

I mean, that comment! My mouth was hanging open, reading it and then I almost fell out of my chair laughing!

It wasn't actually a chest va-jay-jay at all. It was a marsupial pouch. Stupid kids, get it right! ;D

That story was my one and only foray into mpreg--and it was on a dare at that! Poor Clark Kent. The things I did to that boy!

[fanspired]

That is truly weird. In terms of vocabulary and spelling it seems reasonably articulate and educated but then the mode of expression is, as you suggest, apparently very immature and ignorant. It does get you wondering if some kind of irony or parody is intended but, if so, it's very unclear what point is being made O_O

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I swear, it definitely has to be a goof--there's no way that was meant as a serious response! It's sort of old-fashioned, makes a swipe at being fundamentally religious and is also sort of childish, all in one. Kind of a piece of fanwork itself. :D

[fanspired]

It's almost Pythonesque . . .

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

LOL!! It really was!

[gingersnap1224.livejournal.com]

Congratulations! You are the winner of the award for most cuckoo comment ever!

I hope it's performance art, because if so, it's brilliant. This person is the Banksy of the internet.

This comment is the gift that keeps on giving. "Wiener" bwaahaha! "Amoral sex type stuff" Oh, Sis, hand me a tissue cause I can't stop laughing.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

You made me laugh all over again!!

It's pretty great, right? I wonder who else they hit? This is comedy gold, I'm telling you! :D

[rockstarpeach.livejournal.com]

Hahaha!!!

Even better than "va-jay-jay" is "the faggy two male slash".

Oh God, that's my new favourite thing!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

"omg, gurl, did you read the latest faggy two male slash?"

You're right, it has a certain ring to it...

LOL!!!

[jesseofthenorth.livejournal.com]

Pretty hard to take seriously any comment where the writer can't use the words vagina and penis, lol.
And I wonder what they thought they were going to encounter in a fic tagged that way? Someone is clearly pulling your leg, possibly just so they could use the word fag with impunity :/

At least you got a laugh out of it.

Also there sure have been a lot of mean/weird comments on AO3 lately

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I really think it's being done as a lark--someone, or somebodies, who want to be startin' somethin', lol!

Va-jay-jay. Jesus.

[luvmax1.livejournal.com]

Wow. I'm kind of speechless. Even now I'm trying to think of a pithy comment, and all I can do is shake my head.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Right? Um-Um...and that reminds me of the perfect GIF for this post!

[jlvsclrk.livejournal.com]

I mean, it has to be a prank, right? Love the hashtags around 'but very sinful'.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm thinking most definitely! It's just so ridiculous!

[fufaraw]

Um. The thing a lot of people don't know about me is, I'm very literal. Strangers who say a thing have to expect me to take what they say at face value, until I know them better and can parse the humor or sarcasm or whatever they think clever words convey. And with this? My only real reaction is, "Go back to watching Grey's, where they know what a va-jay-jay is," and the relationships are all het and 'murrican middle class "normal." You poor, hidebound, ign'ant infant, you.

Or if it's a joke I didn't get it, with me being literal, and all.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I think your response to this doofus is even better than mine! I'm assuming that that comment was their idea of a prank because really? Va-jay-jay? Or this line:

Of course if all men got pregnant at least once, then perhaps they might see we gals and our va-jay-jays as something to truly worship as is our rights

We gals? Maybe I'm getting comments from the 60s.

[somersault-j.livejournal.com]

Oh man, you wrote a nasty birthding scene? What a bummer it's in a fandom I don't read. I LOVE nasty birthing scenes and I certainly love faggy two male slash.

And I didn't even know a thing like va-jay-jay existed!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I was a nasty *alien* birthing scene, where human Daddy had to cut the alien boy open. Mixing Kryptonian and human DNA together caused a bit of a problem. Dang, that was so much fun to write!

Yes, a va-jay-jay exists, if you are a twelve year old girl. Or boy. Or a 50 year old, pearl-clutching mama.

[phoenixnz.livejournal.com]

Um, what century is this (or they) idiot living in? I mean, honestly! I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the comment, but to me they just made themselves look like a total idiot. Sad, sad person *shakes head*

There really have been some stupid and/or nasty comments on AO3 lately.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Oh, laugh, definitely laugh! I'm pretty sure they're just trolling, thinking it's a big giggle. :D

[rosy5000.livejournal.com]

You know what this comment says to me...

I NEED TO FIND TIME TO RE-READ RIPLEY! *G* I need to be able to stop time, just so I can re-read so many of your stories!

But seriously, I cannot even comprehend how someone could compose a comment like this. If it's a real person commenting, I think they lost themselves a few times. Good for a giggle though.

*wonders off to schedule out time for re-reading fics* ♥

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

LOL! This "person" really knocked themselves out, didn't they? Tsk, all that horrible faggy two male slash!

THERE'S NEVER ENOUGH TIME!

[elwarre.livejournal.com]

ahahahahahaha omg i'm completely dead.

dead.

This is the weirdest combination of fem-shame/pride and homophobia I've ever seen. Also what did she think she was going to find in a story marked M/M and mpreg??

Not that any real, straight guys ever read the faggy two male slash. Only homo queer men Or all the women everywhere?

#but very sinful# shall henceforth be my new slogan

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Or all the women everywhere?

LOL!!! When I opened that comment, I was stunned. I'm reading this thing, open-mouthed, and then laughed my ass off! It's a beautifully crafted piece of drivel, isn't it?


#but very sinful#
We need icons!

[bradygirl_12]

Troll. Whoever it was figured they'd try to get a rise out of you. Mostly they just got laughs. :)

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I LOVE YOUR ICON!!!!

And yep, they made me laugh all right! :D

[tasabian.livejournal.com]

Jeebus! Yeah, it seems like a weird aggregate - a couple of comments mashed together.

On the other hand, if it's real you may have introduced the commenter to slash - no turning back now!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

LOL!!

It does read like someone reached in a hat, pulled out some comments and stitched them together!

[tabaqui]

BWAAAAAAhhahahaahaaha.

I'm going with 'performance art'. :)

So i also went to look and why isn't their name a link? They're not anon, so...i'm confused.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I'm not understanding how that works either. Someone is definitely fucking around there.

[tifaching.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, illicit, illegal, amoral sinful sex type stuff????? LOLOLOLOLOL

Yeah, thirteen sounds about right.

roomie!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

I missed your birthday!!! Hope it was good!

And you know me, I'm all about the amoral! :D

[capnzebbie.livejournal.com]

I have both Ripleys on my kindle. I love that gay two or whatever males having illicit, illegal and amoral sinful sex type stuff!

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

Girl!!! You flatter me! *grins all goofy*

Yes for the two man slash illegal sexy weiner type stuff! :D

[daisydumont.livejournal.com]

I think I remember this story, will go look again. Once upon a time I read a story that had poor Lex birthing little crawling babies out of his bum; they'd climb him like a tree and latch onto a nipple with their claws. Lord only knows who wrote that one. I hope your commenter finds it too. It's #very sinful#. :D

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! Poor Lex! What we did to those boys!!!

[talitha78.livejournal.com]

This whole post, comments and all, fills me with glee. Thanks for the giggles.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

*GRINS* It was a good day--glad to have been of service! ;D

[quiet--tiger.livejournal.com]

AO3 has certainly become a place for weird comments. All those fandoms colliding and inter-meshing, I suppose, with different sorts of people trekking where they wouldn't normally venture (like the weird comments I got on my Tony/Steve/Felicity story, read by people who don't normally read slash). The beauty of the Clark/Lex relationship is that basically anything goes, so maybe newbies shouldn't be reading stories where one guy is an alien and the other often a mutant? Or avoid the stories about two males at all? Cray-cray in the va-jay-jay.

[roxymissrose.livejournal.com]

*FALLS DOWN LAUGHING*
cray-cray, indeed! I think we all need to start posting the weird comments we get. Maybe there should be a comm devoted to them. That way, maybe the bozos will back off, and the folks who are upset by this unwelcome attention will see that it's not directed at them so much as it is This Thing of Ours.